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Now that I was older, I knew what love really was: a fleeting, ridiculous disguise for manipulation and control. Loving a person completely ruined you, and I knew firsthand what kind of damage it could do.
A life had been lost, and there was not a day that went by that I didn't wish it had been mine.
twelve
Felicity
"I swear to God, I'm not moving an inch from here until you give me the deets," Mandy's very annoying voice surrounded me as she hovered over my desk in a black crop today that read Not today, bitches, and baggy denim jeans that hung outrageously low on her hips. "And make it dirty, if you please."
For the umpteenth time, I sighed and fell back against my chair, crossing my arms over my chest. "Madeline Oh, you must be either deaf or in need of a lobotomy. How many times do I have to tell you that nothing happened?"
She frowned. "Don't be rude to me, young lady. And if nothing happened, why has he been staring daggers in this direction for the past five minutes?"
I resisted the urge to turn my head. Instead, settled for a careless shrug. "Beats me."
"Why don't I go and ask him then?" she said with a smirk. "I'm sure he'll be a much better conversationalist than you."
She made to walk past me, and in one quick move, I gripped her upper arm and dragged her back. "Maddy, come on."
She had me right where she wanted me, and the little bitch knew it. "Tick tock, Fliss. Time's ticking."
I sighed again, rolling my eyes. "Fine. I'll tell you, but you have to promise not to tell anyone."
She gave me a look that said I was being ridiculous. "When have I ever?"
True. Nodding, I motioned for her to lean closer to me. "We might have kissed."
Maddy, completely forgetting the promise she just made a mere second ago, gasped, her eyes as wide as saucers. "What in the fuckery?"
Her outburst drew the attention of some of the other employees, and I facepalmed, shaking my head at her dramatics.
"Shit. I'm sorry, Fliss. You took me by surprise, is all," Maddy said, apologetically pressing a hand to her lips. However, there was an underlying buzz to her tone. "It's lunchtime. Let's go to the cafeteria."
We headed to the cafeteria on the third floor. It was one of the reasons I enjoyed working here. Though having lunch in the cafeteria wasn't mandatory, the variety of dishes on the menu each day was pretty nice.
Today, however, I was too giddy to eat anything, so I settled for an apple and a carton of unsweetened yogurt. On the other hand, Maddy had her plate full of mashed potatoes and a well-cooked steak.
"So…keep going," she said, eyes on me as she stuffed her face with mashed potatoes. You were saying you and Hotstuff kissed….?”
My cheeks burned as I scanned the area in case anyone was within hearing distance. When I was convinced the coast was clear and no one was paying us any attention, I turned to her and nodded. "And stop calling him ‘Hotstuff.’ It's weird."
Maddy swallowed, smirking. "Sweetie, if you weren't already all up in that, I would be. Haven't you seen the man? He's God's gift to women everywhere."
I agreed with her. Aaron was very handsome, and it did irk me a little that other women saw it, too.
"So, is that all?" she asked.
This was the issue with Maddy. She loved details. It wasn’t enough for you to tell her you wanted coffee. No. she wanted to know how you got to the coffee shop and how many people were in the line before you.
"That's all." I couldn’t tell her Aaron had his fingers inside me, and for one weak moment, I'd wanted it to be his…penis.
"Uh huh." Her voice was full of disbelief. "So why the fuck do you look like a fucking tomato?"
"What?" I pressed my hands to my cheeks; true enough, I was burning up. "Nothing. You know I blush easily." A trait I cursed every deity out there for; whichever of them gave it to me.
"Don't bullshit me, Felicity. What else did you guys do? What, did he lick your kitty. Are you hoarding the details? Or maybe you were the one who licked his—"
"Madeline!"
