Page 56 of Secret Santa


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I was acting weird.

“Danica–”

“Take your time coming to bed,” I said, turning my back on him.

“Danica,” he said again, his voice firmer. I tensed as I froze. “Look at me, please.” He’d said please, but I knew it wasn’t a request. Slowly, I turned toward him, finding him with pinched brows. I gave him a tight smile. “What’s going on?”

“Nothing,” I said quickly, shaking my head. “I just feel gross after the bar and want a shower.” I chewed on my cheek and his eyes dropped to my mouth.

“Did I do something?” he asked.

“No.” I shook my head again, then forced myself to yawn. “Just tired. Really, don’t worry. I’m fine. We’re fine.” He didn’t look convinced.

“You’d tell me if something was going on, right?” He gave me a look that made my body tighten.

“Of course,” I said, trying to sound casual. He stood, turning the movie off as he did, and slowly walked toward me. I tipped my head back to peer up at him, my lips parting slightly.

“You’d tell me,” he said, his voice deeper, “right?” His eyes searched mine, and I felt myself go weak.

“If anything was wrong, I would tell you,” I said softly. “I promise.” He grabbed my hand, giving it a small squeeze. His thumb rubbed against my finger as he stared at me.

I rested my head against his chest and he froze, then relaxed and wrapped both of his arms around me, sighing against my hair. There were words on the tip of my tongue, words I knew would reassure him. I wanted to tell him, but I didn’t know if now was the right time. I didn’t think I could keep them in anymore.

“I love you, Aiden,” I whispered against his chest, so quietly, I wasn’t sure if he’d even heard. His arms tightened, telling me he’d heard every word, felt them. He didn’t pull back; instead, he pulled me tighter to him, his chest heaving and breath ragged. Finally, I pulled my head back and looked up at him. He stared back with wide eyes, his lips parted slightly.

“You do?” he rasped, and I nodded.

“I do.” I smiled softly, then lifted my hand, wrapping it around the back of his neck. My fingers played with his soft hair, and he shuddered. “I should’ve told you before, but I–I couldn’t. I think I was still scared, worried that you didn’t mean what you said. But after dealing with your father, after tonight, with you not embarrassed to let everyone know we were together…” I trailed off, shrugging slightly. “I think it showed me you really do love me.”

“I do,” he said, his voice strangled. “So fucking much.” I smiled dreamily at him, and his eyes melted. Gently, I tugged him down and he met my lips in a hard kiss. “Never doubt what I say, Danica. I wouldn’t tell you something I didn’t wholeheartedly mean.”

“I know,” I breathed against his mouth. He kissed me again, harder, and I knew he would go further if I let him, but I wanted to give it to him, not like this. I wanted him to unwrap me, my gift to him, before we went there.

I pulled away, our chests heaving with each ragged breath as we stared at each other.

“Soon,” I promised. His eyes darkened, but he didn’t push or try to convince me to do it now. He just nodded, then stole another kiss. “I’m going to shower,” I laughed, taking another step back.

He took a deep breath, like he was trying to cool his heated blood. “Okay,” he finally said. “I’ll be in the office.” He brushed his lips against mine again, letting them linger.

It was so hard to pull away from him. I wanted to strip us of our clothes and lead him to bed, but I had some restraint. I’d already gone twenty-four years without sex, I could wait a few more minutes.

Reluctantly, we went our separate ways. I could see the proof of his arousal as he walked out of the room, adjusting himself, wincing slightly. It made my heart warm knowing he’d stay uncomfortable for me.

As fucked up as that sounds, it was sweet.

Hurrying, I ran up the stairs and into the bedroom. I’d hidden the little bag in the back of the closet in a section I didn’t think he’d look in. It was still there and untouched, thankfully. I grabbed it, tearing it open, and rushed to get undressed.

Holding up the silky red fabric in front of me, my face heated. Was I really going to wear this? I bit my lip. There was no going back now, I thought. I took the rest of my clothes off, then slid the lingerie on.

It had a red bow he’d have to untie, like a gift. Was it a little self-centered and pretentious to think of myself as his Christmas gift? Probably, but I didn’t care. I didn't think he would either.

I slid my black heels back on then made my way to the bathroom to touch up my hair and makeup. I felt ridiculous getting ready for this, but I couldn’t imagine not doing it. I wanted it to be perfect, and somehow, doing my makeup made me feel better. It made me feel centered and calmer. My hands stopped shaking as much and my breathing got easier.

I stared at myself in the mirror. The next time I saw myself, I wouldn’t be a virgin anymore…hopefully. Hopefully, in just a few short minutes, I’d be Aiden’s, wholly.

I slid a robe on, and then, with a deep breath, made my way downstairs. I still had time to change my mind, but with each step closer to the office, I felt more and more ready. I felt sure of my decision, of Aiden and our relationship.

Standing outside the office, slightly to the side so he couldn’t see me through the open doorway, I forced myself to steady my breathing. It was time.

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