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“Lyons Club, I mean.”
This is news to me. “You were going to sneak out while I was busy?”
“No! Not like that, not at all.”
“I was kidding.” Half kidding at least.
Nate sighs and grabs his ankles.
He’s wearing loafers.Loafers. Like Edwin.
I didn’t know he had clothes like these. “I just need to get out of the house.”
“Yeah, you’re getting better.”
Panic flashes on his face. “Not all the way better.”
I remember the conversation with Edwin in the kitchen in the middle of the night a few nights ago. They want him back on the board. I get it.
But knowing that Edwin sees something happening between Nate and me just confirms that they’re willing to look past the fact I’m not actually needed in order to keep Nate happy. To keep me close.
“Anyway, none of that matters right now. What happened?” Nate asks. “Did he upset you?”
I shake my head. “No, he was fine.Iupset me.”
Confusion is evident on Nate’s face.
I lick my lower lip and take a few breaths to keep myself calm. “He wanted to know about what happened and why we broke up. Did he tell you that’s what he was going to talk to me about?”
Nate doesn’t confirm or deny.
“I wish you hadn’t sprung that on me,” I say.
“Yeah, I’m sorry about that. You’ve just been hard to catch, Lanes.”
I swallow. Lane, Lanes, good girl, princess, queen, all of these names except my actual one.
Laney is not special. Laney is fucked up. Laney cannot be trusted.
Why can’t they see that? Why can’t they see I’m being torn in two with feelings for both of them?
“I’m so screwed up.” My voice comes out whimpery, with tears I don’t expect.
“No, you’re not, honey.”
Honey. “No, I am. I’m so fucking screwed around in the head.”
“That’s not true.”
“It is, Nate. It is!”
He leans closer to me. “I won’t let you talk about yourself like that.”
“You should let me. Because it’s what I deserve.”
“You don’t deserve anything like that, Laney. Are you kidding? You’re…” His hands are tentative again, reaching toward me.
Part of me wants to crawl out of my skin. The other part wants his hands all over me, reminding me what it is about me he wants and needs.Craves.
