AllFreeNovel
Share Us
We arrive at the convention.Just us three innocent girls, dressed to impress. I’m the green one. I think that makes me Buttercup. We pretend we have correlating personalities, but the truth is that Bubbles has blonde hair and Blossom already had a big red bow in her closet. We’re all wearing white tights and black Mary Janes. Well, they are— my shoes are more Mary Jane-esque, but I already had them. Neither of the other two girls cared. I already had the black belt. All I’d done was buy a pair of white tights.
But of course everyone knew who we were- one in green, one in pink, and one in blue. With our hair properly done up. I was trying to meet another friend, and, I swear, it took us forty five minutes to cross the floor to get to him! Because every two minutes we’d get stopped by someone wanting a picture with us, squealing, “Ohmygod, the Powerpuff Girls! You’re so cute!” And then someone said, “Did you see HIM? You should totally get a picture with them!”
So off we went through the crowds, in search of our arch nemesis. Sort of. We weren’t exactly in any rush, and then we found soft pretzels and—
But anyway, after an hour or two, hah, success! We found HIM. HIM, if you’re not familiar, is short for His Infernal Majesty. They’re supposed to be the devil, I guess. I’m not that familiar either, so I’m unsure if it’s a “he” or a “them.”
And that HIM. It took them a day to get into their makeup and costume, if it took them three minutes. Paid off, too. Their look stunned the crowds. And here’s us, slapping on our dresses and bows, right there next to them.
Because, honestly, it’s not about how much money you put into something. Did HIM deserve credit for their elaborate getup? Of course. And I think it made them happy to do it. They loved the skill, the craftsmanship, the months (I’m sure!) that it took for this final masterpiece to be born. I don’t begrudge them one dime or one minute of it.
But if you don’t love it? People just want to see that you tried. That you’re having fun. That you’re trying to make it fun forthem, the people who show up because they want to escape for a day. No, we’re far from professionals, but it’s the little folk, like us, that create the ambience. Somebody will remember “those three Powerpuff Girls” for years afterwards and love how simple, but how effective our costume turned out. And it will make them smile, because that was their favorite cartoon growing up and remember how mom and dad would make us popcorn the way we liked it best and let us have a special soda?!?
The crowds will give you just as much attention, or, if they don’t, enough that you won’t notice. Maybe it turns out we got less attention that day than the fancy costumes. But maybe it also turned out to be a nicer experience tonotbe swarmed like a celebrity but merely showered with affection and kindness. Who knows, and, frankly, who cares? All I know is how much fun I had.
Also, and this is random and unexpected, I run into not one, but two of my ex playmates. Thank God, not at the same location. Does this happen to other people? It must, because honestly I don’t really date that much. Like, not even three people at the same time. And I didn’t even begin to date until I was practically twenty! I’ve only had five years of this, and two of those years were in other countries! I can’t possibly have collected that many exes. The fortunate part is that I didn’t have to fight either of them to the death. This is always a good thing.
That night, I fell asleep dreaming of fighting bad guys and flying through rainbow portals and houses full of pink and purple pony doll balloons that lined the ceilings as I bobbed and weaved through the home. At the top, I sat down to tea in the attic with one of my dolls come to life. We were about to drink our tea when a giant spider dropped into the middle of the table like the spider from Little Miss Muffet.
Don’t ask me how my mind works. When I fall asleep, hey, I’ve got absolutely no say in what my mind decides is a good time. I suppose I have no choice but to let it have its fun. I had a good day today, after all.
* * *
August 14, 7:45pm
I wishI had someone beyond David and Dee to talk to about life and love and romance and all that. I wish my life was a movie. With a sound track that followed me from place to place. Warning me of when something bad was about to happen or something good. I keep my earbuds in place, and this makes me feel like I have a soundtrack to my life, but also, it interferes with my ability to tell what’s going on around me. Which is inconvenient, and, of course impossible when I’m working.
I don’t want to be the female lead, though. I’m glad she is happy finding her love and getting married and having kids. But quite honestly, I’m in no rush. I know, people only say that kind of thing when they don’t think they can get it, anyway. But for what it’s worth, I’ve sidetracked a couple of guys out of uttering marriage proposals. It just didn’t feel right. I don’t know what else to say.
I wish I could see Paris, Odin, and Thor more. But, you know, busy lives and all.
I tried telling Rachel about the convention, but I can tell she finds it boring. I am too scared to tell her about David, but I do tell her about Laura. I also tell her about all my boys. She didn’t seem to quite understand how I was managing to juggle all three and wasn’t I dating that other girl already? Wasn’t that enough for me? She’s always wanted nothing more than to find her one, get married, settle down. I’ve known about that, but still, I want to talk to her. I hope she finds her classic fairytale life. Only that never really appealed to me.
In college, I ended up with a couple the first time I dated. I just thought it made more sense to date someone who was already dating. You know, learn from them. God knows, I didn’t know what I wanted back then.
She just wanted to change the subject to what I thought I’d be up to this summer, because she was planning a two week get away to Cabo. And she wanted me to come along with her. Maybe she hopes she’ll find me the perfect guy out there, and all the rest would fade away into the background. Maybe she’s right. I don’t really know other people doing what I’m doing. I’m just making it up as I go along.
Ugh. I should really get up and take care of some errands and be a proper adult. I can do that.
* * *
August 15, 7:25am
Dee calls me.She forgot her white tights at my apartment and her big red bow. I put it out for her, because I don’t know if I’ll be home when she drops by on her way to the airport. Nobody is going to steal a red bow and tights. I catch sight of myself in the mirror, and I think, I look nice. I look just like me.
It’s rare that people are just themselves these days. I dressed up in costume with my friends, but that was just for a day. Some people dress up everyday.
Laura pretends to be the perfect obedient daughter for her family. She runs sex parties to try to pretend she’s fighting it, but she doesn’t tell them what she does. She says she’s in marketing. Well, I suppose she’s not lying about that. She just doesn’t clarifywhatshe’s marketing.
Tom pretends he is the perfect son and soon to be father, too. After our awkward last date, he got married one of the girls from our high school.Does he miss me? I don’t miss him. What does that make me?I see him and his wife at the friends meetups when I’m I town to visit my family. He keeps looking at me. It’s never much, just some social occasion where he and I both show up. I don’t know beforehand that he’ll be there, and he doesn’t know I’ll be there. I can’t help seeing something in his look that says, I miss you. But does he miss the real me, or the illusion of me?
I wonder if it’s as exhausting for them, and for most people, as it feels for me. To dress up and be someone one is not. But at least I don’t have to pretend with those I keep most dear to me. That’s gotta count for something.
* * *
October 9, 7:25pm
A funny thinghappened this week. I had a blind date I set up through a dating app. It was this quite nice little cafe, too. I got there early, cause, well, nerves. I ordered a cappuccino and biscotti to as to have something to munch on that wasn’t too filling.
