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“I really don’t want to be one of those girls, Owen, but…” she said eventually, her voice empty and face blank. “I really was ok just staying free and off the cuff with things.”
I wasn’t sure where the fuck she was going with that.
“But then things changed?”
She bit her lip again, and my eyes couldn’t help but drop to her mouth. She was literally crying in front of my and I couldn’t fucking stop my cock from draining my brain of all my logic.
Goddamnit…
“Nothing really changed,” she whispered. “I just finally realized what I’d already been feeling.”
Mia rubbed her sternum, then seemed to shake out of her fog and looked around.
“I’d like to have the rest of this conversation dressed,” she said in a quiet voice, gripping the sides of the tub as she stood.
I gathered a towel for her, but didn’t do what I normally would have. I didn’t wrap her in it, then fold my arms around her. She always giggled when I did that. Today, it didn’t seem like the right thing to do though, all things considered.
Mia wrapped tightly in the towel, but looked down at her shorts and sweater with a frown.
“Here,” I told her, taking her hand, finally touching her as I dragged her out of the bathroom and toward my dresser where I got out my favorite Cambridge sweats and an oversized t-shirt.
She accepted them wordlessly and pulled the shirt on first, then the pants, which sat a little snug against her full hips.
Mia moved toward the bed and sat on the edge, fingers squeezing around the edge of the mattress.
“What can I do?” I asked her, brushing back a few strands of hair from her cheek.
She shook her head.
“I think I just need time to think. Maybe I’m just being ridiculous and hormonal or something. Nothing feels as bad after sleeping on it.”
“That’s true,” I agreed.
I wasn’t sure what to do though. Paula would agree that I didn’t know a single thing to do with an emotional, irrational woman.
“Do you want me to drive you home, or…”
I didn’t want to assume she wanted to stay with me.
She considered it.
“Can I stay here tonight? The thought of going home with Clea there ready to ask questions and…I want you to hold me.”
Shit…
I didn’t think, I just grabbed her and pulled her into my arms where she started crying again. I couldn’t remove the rending of her heart, but I could do this. I could hold her and carry her if she was too weak to stand on her own.
My chest bloomed with heat and sadness and my heart pumped hard. I laid with her, both of us above the covers as a stiff, cool breeze flooded in from the window.
“I’m sorry, Mia,” I whispered into her hair. “I want to take the uncertainty away from you. It shouldn’t hurt to love.”
She cried harder and I shut my eyes, squeezing them closed as I tried to think of what else I could say. There was only one thing I could say back to take the pain away from her, but I couldn’t.
Fuck…could I?
Didn’t matter that I already knew I loved the girl. I’d known for a while. It just didn’t make any difference to how things would play out between us.
Mia had the world at her fingertips, ready to really dive in for the first time, and I was a single dad who’d already fucked up one relationship, and was terrified of fucking up another.
