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I nod along, glancing at the clock again.
Then, I hear the sound of another car in the driveway. She’s here.
I can’t wait to make Breanna question all of her assumptions about me.
"Actually, Breanna, I wanted you to meet someone," I announce, gesturing towards the door. In walks a confident, well-dressed woman – a woman who comes when I call. Jaxon knows her as a friend, but I don’t want him to witness this scene.
I take a couple of steps backward, into the front hall, and Breanna follows like I am physically pulling her.
By the time I open the front door, I catch a couple of hints of discomfort. Breanna bites her lip and folds her arms across her body. Triumphantly, I greet Sarah with a hug, then a kiss, keeping it short because Jaxon could come in at any moment and interrupt my victorious moment.
Breanna's eyes widen in surprise, her focus shifting from Jaxon’s head over the back of the couch to the unexpected guest. I maintain a composed demeanor, leading my friend further into the house.
"Breanna, this is Sarah," I say with a smile. "Sarah, meet Breanna, our nanny."
Breanna stands up, a hint of confusion in her expression. "Hi," she greets, extending a hand.
"Nice to meet you, Breanna," Sarah replies, shaking her hand. "I've heard so much about you. It's clear you're starting to be an important part of this little guy's life."
I watch Breanna's reaction closely, a subtle satisfaction creeping in as she processes the unexpected introduction. The realization that I have a life beyond the confines of work and fatherhood seems to dawn on her. The fact that other women want me, and I don’t need Breanna is the point I’m trying to drive home. It seems to be working.
"Oh, um, thanks," Breanna stammers, a bit taken aback. "I didn't expect you to bring someone over."
I nod, maintaining eye contact. "Well, I thought it was time for you to see that I can handle things on my own – that I have a life outside of being a parent."
The room falls silent for a moment, the unspoken tension hanging thick in the air.
The revelation creates a palpable tension between Breanna and me. Sarah, oblivious to the underlying dynamics, heads further into the house and chats amicably with Jaxon, attempting to diffuse the awkward atmosphere. Jaxon is used to my friends coming over at unexpected hours, but especially after dinner. Most of the time, I would just have Lisa stay until Jaxon’s bedtime if I was planning on having a night out.
Breanna's gaze sharpens, and a flicker of something crosses her eyes – perhaps a mix of surprise and realization. I decide to seize the moment, breaking the silence that threatens to consume us.
"Breanna, thanks for taking care of Jaxon today. Tomorrow will be another long day. Why don’t you head home?” I can’t control the patronizing tone in my voice. It sounds like I’m sending a little kid to bed, and that’s exactly what it feels like. Breanna is going home, and I’m going to enjoy some time with Sarah.
She narrows her eyes, seemingly unconvinced. "Why bring Sarah here then if you’re so worried about a long day tomorrow then?" She’s throwing the gauntlet down, asking if our interaction meant anything.
It did. Of course, it did. I still remember the brief graze of her fingers on my skin, the lingering of her eyes on my body as I allowed my eyes to take hers in, but I can’t give away how much it meant.
I glance at Sarah, who is still engaged with Jaxon, then back at Breanna. "I don’t believe that enjoyment is just for the weekends. I relax and unwind whatever night I want.”
Breanna's expression shifts, a mix of emotions playing across her face. There's a challenge in her eyes, a spark of defiance that mirrors my own. It's as if the unspoken competition we've started is now laid bare for both of us to confront.
"Fine," she retorts, crossing her arms. "You can have your company, but it doesn't change the fact that I'm good at what I do."
I raise an eyebrow, a smirk playing on my lips. I imagine the kind of things she might be good at doing. "I never doubted your skills as a nanny. But just so we're clear, this," I gesture towards Sarah and me, "is my personal life. It's separate from the professional arrangement we have."
Breanna's lips curve into a sly smile, challenging me back. "Good for you, then. I'll continue doing my job, and you can continue with your personal life."
The tension between us seems to shift, taking on a charged quality. The unspoken challenge lingers in the air. After another long look, Breanna turns and leaves the room. I listen as the front door closes, then wait in the front hall for another moment, imagining her marching back to the shack where she lives next door.
Sarah smiles at me. “What time does he go to bed?” she asks suggestively.
But suddenly, I find that now that Breanna is no longer here, my desire for Sarah has lessened. I can’t imagine taking her upstairs and touching her body. I just want to be with Breanna.
I turn away from Sarah and step into the kitchen, buying myself time for an answer by opening the fridge and scanning its contents.
“Soon, I guess. Can I offer you some pasta casserole?” I take out the fancy dish. It was a frozen dinner, but it has actually turned out pretty well.
Sarah sits at the bar, watching me. Can she sense the shift in mood now that Breanna has left? I wonder if Breanna is going out and who she’s meeting.
