AllFreeNovel
Share Us
He’s giving his desire over to me.
His deepest needs.
Irrevocably.
“If you don’t already hate me, sweetheart—” I flick the seam of his lips with the tip of my tongue and tighten my fingers around him a fraction, “—you will after tonight.”
Chapter 22
Shiloh
Showering before what’s going to happen tonight is relatively fruitless, but it gives me time to myself to work out how I feel about it. This is what I want. What I asked for.
It’s the ‘sweetness’ that has my stomach twisting up in knots.
Maybe that’s part of the psychological torture of it all: get me lax and comfortable before the scene.
Or maybe worse this is Corvin taking what he needs out of this relationship before giving me mine. Because that would mean I have to face the feelings I’ve been blatantly ignoring.
I don’t know what scares me more: the fact that Corvin cares about me beyond our sex life, or that I’m going to let him inside me tonight—no, he’s going to force himself inside me whether I like it or not.
A shiver breaks out across my body even though the water streaming down is blistering hot.
How fucked up is it to have a rape fantasy after what I’ve been through?
I get dressed before going back to the room. Something simple and casual after wearing that suit for hours. Leggings, a tank, and a hoodie. Classic combo.
Corvin is sitting at his desk when I get back, and he doesn’t even look at me before crooking a finger in my direction. Like a trained whore, I go. I perch myself on the edge of his desk, and he grabs my leg with his strong fingers.
“I want to go over a few things before we go.”
I groan, and he lightly swats my thigh. “Condoms. I’ll have several in case one tears, which given what I have in mind is highly likely. It doesn’t matter what you say, if you change your mind, unless you tell me right now that you don’t want them, we will be using condoms for the whole scene.”
I nod quickly, because this is a hard limit of mine. One day, I think it’d be kind of hot to be filled with cum, but right now all I can think about is the overabundance of douche I had to use to finally feel like none of those men were inside me anymore.
“Restraints. I’ll have the tie and physical force. You told me you like bruises, but how do you feel about ones like that?”
“If it’s you? Any and all. I can handle it.”
Corvin levels me with a stern stare and raises his hand to my waist. “But do you want it?”
Fuck him for always making me say that hard shit out loud.
“Yes. I want you to cover me in bruises.”
With a smile, he scoots his chair back and redirects it in front of me, both hands on my waist now. “Good boy.”
He guides his fingers over my ribs, which are mostly healed but still sore. “Safewords are Starfish for stop. Yellow for slow down. If you can’t speak and your hands are bound, can you snap your fingers?”
I do, and he drags me to the edge of the desk. “I have one, too. It’s a full stop. I only use it when I reach my limit or when I can tell we’ve passed yours. Maroon.”
“Like red but darker?”
“Exactly.” Corvin stands and rests his hands on my cheeks, bringing our lips together but only with the softest pressure. “But before any of that… humor me. For a little while, none of this exists. It’s just you and me like none of the bullshit between us ever happened.”
He means if he hadn’t been the unfortunate soul my pain latched onto it. If he hadn’t found me that night.
“If I hadn’t let you walk away,” he whispers, and then he’s kissing me again.
