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Trina has been blowing up my phone since my plane landed in Boston. Each notification brings me closer to the idea that she has more to do with my current predicament than I know. I don’t know what she could have possibly been sending Isla after our breakup, or why. I need to find out, though. And I will, but on my timeline, not hers.
When I ignore another incoming call, my mom sighs.
“She’s relentless.”
She knows everything I know, I laid it all out for her on the flight. She’s never liked Trina much. On the flip side of that, she loved Isla from their first meeting. Like always, she’s not hiding her opinion. While we talked about the little hints of information Isla and Willa have given me, Mom cried. There’s some woman’s intuition and motherly shit there that she understands more than I do.
It’s harder and harder to hold on to my anger for Isla when I see the hurt in her eyes like I did last night. Hell, I even saw it in Willa’s and my mother’s. Isla’s reactions tell me she hasn’t been making decisions out of spite or to pay me back for being a complete asshole.
I’m scum. No matter what she has done, this all starts with me being a piece of shit.
“I know. I’ll deal with it before I head back to Seattle.”
“You need to tell Trina to stop sending things to Isla,” she stresses.
“We don’t even know if she’s been doing that.”
“Cillian, why would Isla lie about that?”
She wouldn’t. Isla doesn’t have a vengeful heart; she wouldn’t make something up for the sole purpose of getting back at me for being a cheating idiot. Isla wouldn’t, but I’m starting to think Trina would.
Trina:
Call me when you land. I want to see you as much as I can before you leave.
“She wouldn’t.”
“Right. Get to the bottom of it, fast. For the sake of my granddaughter, if not yourself.”
Me:
Already landed. Dropping Mom, then headed home. Meet me there?
Trina sits in her car that’s parked in the guest parking spot assigned to my apartment when the car drops me off. This woman has been a constant in my life for years. I thought I knew everything there was to know about her. Now, I look at her and it’s like I never knew her at all. She’s spoon-fed me only what she’s wanted, it’s not like I’ve met her family or even friends of hers outside of circle of team staff.
Analyzing it, I realize there is a pattern to Trina’s friendship. Anything I ever went through here in Boston, she had a story ready to go about how she could relate. That used to seem comforting, when instead it was probably all bullshit stories to create a connection that wasn’t real.
It hits me that Isla probably feels the same way about me that I feel about Trina right now. My stomach knots with the truth of it. When you tell someone to trust you, to place their faith in you, you should mean it. You should live it. I didn’t hold up my end with Isla. Apparently, Trina didn’t hold her end up with me.
Whatever has happened, tonight, I get to the fucking rock bottom of it.
“Did you know she was pregnant?” As soon as she steps out of her car, I demand an answer.
“Isla? Or course not, how would I?”
“She says she called me and told me, and you were there.”
“Isla has lied to you for years. Why would she start telling the truth now,” Trina answers with an eye roll. Her jaw twitches though, and she shuffles her feet in an uncomfortable manner.
“I remember getting drunk with Tor that night, and I vaguely remember you showing up. But I didn’t invite you into my bed for months after.” I was so sure Isla would change her mind about cutting me out of her life. That if I just played my cards right, gave her the space she needed and didn’t fuck around, I’d have the chance to win her back. Isla is stubborn as fuck and eventually the toll was too much, I had to accept that I’d lost her and if I wasn’t careful, I was going to lose my career, too. Though I wasn’t making advances on Trina, she was still coming around to listen to my woes.
“What night?”
“The night she broke up with me,” I stress, not buying that she isn’t following along.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
