AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“I just worked so damn hard for that professional validation. The security of it.” He shook his head, jaw feathering again. I wanted to smooth out the lines on his forehead, only that thought made me realize I needed to relax the muscles in mine. They ached like I’d been pinching pennies between my brows. Finally, he turned to meet my eyes, an echo of my trepidation reflected at me there. “This feels like some kind of cosmic joke. Start over after twelve years of school and nearly six years of teaching, or wedge myself into a long-distance relationship with the woman of my dreams? If there is a god, it certainly has a sense of humor.”
We touched down on the Tampa tarmac with a jolt, and Broderick wordlessly squeezed the back of my neck in reassurance. Florida was known for very few things more than their bipolar weather, which meant the descent had been bumpy, at best. At least it was an accurate depiction of my mental health today.
On the tail end of a long inhale, he managed a one-word question with more hope in his voice than in his eyes. “Beach?”
“They say that answers are often found on the sea.” Hell, even I heard how forced my voice was.
“Is that a yes?” he asked, the first hint at his sincere smile tugging at the corner of his lips.
“That’s a yes.” I smiled back at him, hoping for a stroke of genius to strike one of us like lightning. “But coffee first?”
He rose from the aisle seat and unlatched the luggage compartment to retrieve our bags. Hope stirred in my chest as he seemed to thaw out a bit. “At least some things are dependable.”
“Like my love of sunshine and caffeine?” I asked, sliding out into the aisle beside him.
“Yes, like those,” he said, gently setting my bag down and sliding the handle up to pass over to me. “And also, how much I love you.”
Broderick
“People can say what they want, but there’s nothing quite like a Florida beach.”
“No, there’s not,” I agreed, sidling up next to El, where she halted in the shallows, surveying the impressive stretch of white sand packed full of people. Music blasting, seagulls cawing, people laughing, and not a single flake of snow or wrap of garland to be seen. It was loud and overwhelming, but the sun was as warm on my skin as the sand was on the soles of my feet. I had to hand it to the sunshine state; seeing people with heritage from every corner of the world all in one space was certainly refreshing.
The ride had been…uncomfortably silent.
I didn’t have a suitable answer for us, so I understood why El had spooled herself inside her head, but that didn’t ease the way her withdrawal had me panicking. She was wearing a bright blue two-piece that made those steel-blues pop. Using some kind of witchcraft I didn’t understand, she’d piled her feet of hair into a solitary clip, stray pieces blowing in that hint of breeze the gulf was known for.
The bare, tan strip of skin between her top and expertly tied wrap was just begging me to run my fingers over it. But it felt…wrong. Stiff. Like her formally straight spine, and shoulders pulled back were preparing her for battle, not affection. Like her eyes were on the crowd to avoid me, instead of absorbing the commotion.
“So, this is it,” she whispered. “Our last stolen moment of alone time.”
“I mean, for a bit,” I amended. Clinging to hope that one of us would craft a solution we could both live with.
“For a bit,” she agreed, but the sugared smile on her face didn’t bring any life to her eyes. Vlog face. My gut sank.
“Yeah,” I said, not bothering to hide the fact that the reality of it sucked. Well. Here goes nothing. My Hail Mary pass. “The sooner we rip off the bandage, the sooner I can hold you in public again. So, when should we tell them? Ease into it one at a time, or tackle the entire group together?”
“Um…” She turned down the beach, where laughing kids were flying kites and splashing in the shallow turquoise water. Innocent. Beautifully oblivious to the man trying not to puke as he walked a tightrope. “Listen, Brod.”
Fuck. Me. My stomach sunk like a rock off the pier. “Please don’t say what you’re about to say.” I shook my head, the familiar vice of panic constricting around my body. “Please don’t ‘listen, Brod’ me?—”
“I don’t think we should tell them,” she blurted over the end of my sentence before pressing her palms to her mouth, then smooshing them over her cheeks like she could rub away the emotions in her skull. She brought her hands together in front of her lips as if in prayer, and I watched them as I tempered my voice.
“Don’t ask me to keep lying to them, baby. Please don’t make me do that. I want to parade you around the city—want everyone to know you’re mine. I’ve been working up to telling your brothers how much I love you since I was seventeen.”
“It’s not fair to get their hopes up when the odds of this working in the long run are as grim as they are.”
I straightened my spine, cocking my head as my heart… stopped. Not that she could see it, as she expertly avoided looking at me.
Composing myself, I said, “Christ, baby, you make it sound like one of us got a diagnosis, not offered job security.”
“I know,” she said under her breath, taking slow steps through the shrinking fingers of the waves. I watched the water rush up again, erasing the print of her footfalls with a horrible sinking sensation in my stomach. “But in terms of a functional relationship, being long-distance for nine months a year is about as optimal as a cancer in the body.”
“What are you saying?” I asked, snatching her wrist and tugging her to a halt. The warm waves collided with our feet. Birds yelled as they dove to scavenge prizes from the crowd, and my pulse attempted to slam directly through my skin as my life tried to slip through my fingers as fluidly as the sand between our toes. Suddenly, the blaring sun and chattering voices were too much, pressing against my skin, even as her glossy eyes came to mine.
“I’m saying that I love you. And that because I love you, I cannot rob you of eighteen years of effort. You already gave up the grant trying to give me a leg up.” Those brimming tears crept silently from the corners of her eyes. It should’ve been a crime to make Elora Rhodes cry, I decided. Just watching that dam break sent a hot rod through my chest. I couldn’t help but reach up to wipe them off her cheeks. To my relief, she leaned into my hand as she worried her bottom lip, eyes locking on mine. “I’m also too smart to turn down an endorsement like a television network. This is it, Brod. This is that big break moment. I will not beat the resources and exposure they can throw at this school. Not by a long shot. Not even Paxton could get us in front of this many eyes as often as they will.”
“I would never ask you to give that up,” I assured her, cursing my voice for coming out so weakly. My hands found her waist on autopilot and I finally inhaled when she didn’t resist me pulling our bodies together. “You gotta slow down, Pix. We gotta talk before you just throw out the best thing to happen in my life… unless there’s another reason you don’t want to be together?”
