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And I almost let them. I did, I almost let it happen!
“I’m so sorry,” Paige whispers.
I can’t breathe as her arms tighten around me.
“Val, please talk to me.”
Tears leak from my eyes when I squeeze them shut.
“What’s so wrong with me, Paige? Why is loving me so hard? What am I doing wrong?”
She pulls back with a fierce expression. “Nothing! There is nothing wrong with you. It’s them. You know that.”
I shake my head, liquid obscuring my vision.
How am I supposed to believe that when all the evidence points at something else? Even my own sister gets punished for choosing me.
Nobody needs you. Nobody even wants you.
I wipe my sleeve across my eyes as I back away.
“Val…”
“No. I have to go.”
“Will you?—”
I yank my arm from her grasp. “Just… Don’t follow me, okay? I want to be alone.”
“Val, wait! Please!”
I ignore her as I charge down the sidewalk.
Nobody needs you. Nobody even wants you.
Not even your own parents.
The air outside is no less toxic. I still can’t breathe as I stumble along the sidewalk. Years of pent-up tears fall harder with each step. They sear down my cheeks and burn the collar of my stupid button-up shirt. I don’t even try to stop them. What’s the point? No one’s here to notice them.
Because nobody needs you. Nobody even wants you.
I undo the buttons as I walk, ripping the shirt off my shoulders and slamming it into a waste bin I pass. Several bystanders stare at me, but I don’t give a shit. I’d shove more stuff in the garbage if I had anything else.
It’s a chilly May evening as I continue on in just my undershirt and jeans, but it feels right. All that’s missing is a good old-fashioned mugging or hit-and-run to round out the evening from hell. Would anyone care if I never returned to the hotel tonight? No one would even notice. Paige and Nash have their own room on a different floor. Larinda won’t even be in the city for much longer.
I’m completely alone.
My phone is buzzing in my pocket, and I pull it out just to shut it off. I don’t need more lies from anyone. Not Paige telling me it’s everyone else who’s the problem or Rhonda and Burt trying to con their own son into a fucking namedrop. I especially don’t need Larinda pretending there’s a chance in hell our impossible situation will work itself out. I don’t doubt her feelings for me, but I doubt every other fantasy we’ve constructed about our forbidden fairy tale. That’s not how things go for me. I give everything and lose it. I surrender my soul only to be crushed and stomped on over and over. And still I’m willing to trust and get trampled again.
I’m the guy who gives up everything in exchange for a broken heart no one wants.
It’s a really bad fucking day when you realize the only person who’s truly been honest with you is Jarvis McKinnley.
26—PITTSBURGH (SOME RANDOM STREET)
LARINDA
“You’re already ten minutes late for bus call,” Travis grumbles. “Please just let us search for him. We promise to keep you updated.”
