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“Hard to say. Part of it was that you were my first, but also you took care of me differently.” I fussed with the hem of my shirt. “It’s like they could cater to me as an omega but not to me as Allie. If that makes sense.”
“So, you felt like a job to the others?”
“Sort of? It’s hard to explain because I am a job to them. It was weird with other partners too. No one was encouraging me to explore and find what I really wanted out of the experience. I kept feeling like I was constantly brushing the edge out there.” I sighed and turned my chair to face him directly. “I always tried to explain to my partners, but words only do so much with someone who doesn’t have the instinct to go along with it, and I didn’t fully understand it myself.”
The only problem was that I needed to make him understand now even though I had never properly figured it out.
“I wanted,” I continued, “someone who could pull me under, who wanted me to see the depth, but who could also bring me back to the surface. I never knew how to get that back.”
“What about non-heat partners?”
If nothing else, I had at least captured his curiosity.
“Audacious.” I laughed. “I like it. Well, I was mildly obsessed with you for a while after, but I did try with other people. Nothing stuck, though.”
I wanted to capture more than his curiosity, though, and it seemed like the only way that was going to happen was if I pulled on my big girl panties and grabbed for what I wanted. I couldn’t leave here tonight without having done everything possible to bring this man back into my life.
“Sidney.”
“Hmmm?”
“I have a question.”
“Oh?”
I reached out and traced my thumb over his skin before setting my hand over his. “How long do I have to be here before you kiss me?”
Everything froze: my heart, my breath, maybe time. Her dark eyes were like molten chocolate, and lust flowed through me like lava. It wasn’t fair. I knew how to handle clients, knew what to do when it was a sure thing and a job to be done. How the fuck did I approach someone who was neither?
I hadn’t had a relationship since my teen years, and had only been on a handful of dates amid my years as a heat helper. I didn’t know how to do this. If we’d run into one another at a club or something more sexually coded than a grocery store, I might have had the balls to say something. I’d grown less confident with people I wanted to sleep with who weren’t clients or hookups. It also didn’t help that being so close to her was fucking with my head. I wanted her with a drowning desperation and thank god she was braver than I was because that simple question spurred me into motion.
I leaned toward her, magnetized. I slid my fingers into her hair and met her mouth with mine, reveling in the soft sound she made at the contact.
She tasted like every dream dripped onto my tongue. I had spent too much time imagining this moment.
Allie climbed onto my lap, and I cupped her ass as she slid her hands up my chest, hooking her elbow around my neck. She kissed me like she was trying to devour me, grinding her hips against me, a desperate whimper breaking free when I squeezed her ass. Her teeth scraped against my bottom lip, and her tongue sought out mine.
The last time we’d been together, I’d been her guide, but this time it was all I could do to keep up with her. Past Allie had been exuberant but hesitant. Present Allie knew exactly what she wanted and it had my blood sizzling. She growled, and my cock strained uncomfortably against my zipper.
My little omega wasn’t so shy anymore.
I released an answering growl that rumbled deep in my chest. Her fingers curled into the collar of my shirt and she held on like she was afraid I’d disappear.
“Sweet fuck,” she gasped out, moaning as she slid a hand into my hair. I pulled away from her mouth, diving to nip at the scent gland on her throat, sucking on the sensitive patch of skin until she was shaking, her whimpers and writhing melting rational thought straight out of my brain. Every sense was saturated with honeysuckle and heat, and I craved more.
I hooked my hands under her thighs and lifted us off the chair. A puppy howl stopped me in my tracks.
Fuck.
“I have to bring them inside first,” I murmured against her skin.
She slid down me and stayed on tiptoe, stealing another kiss before she grinned at me. “I’ll help you gather the herd.”
Was this actually happening? The moment wasn’t ruined? Did she actually want me as much as I wanted her?
We worked quickly, scooping up wiggling pups and depositing them into the nursery, cleaning up the dishes and packing up the remaining food. I scrubbed my hands to give myself a moment to think before turning back to her. Her curls were mussed and her cheeks were still flushed.
The brief reprieve from the torrent of hormones let me breathe. Except I didn’t want any more moments to pass without touching her.
