Page 84 of The Pain We Nurture


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Olivia glanced down at her outfit. She was in a light blue wrap dress with red heels and a simple gold necklace hung from her neck with a solitary diamond. A beautiful silk floral scarf decorated her shoulders, another gift from Colin. Turning her head with an idea forming, she sighed with relief as she could see their hotel from the sidewalk.

She looked at her phone and pulled up her maps app and seeing a men’s store close by within walking distance. Paying for her coffee, she slung her purse over her shoulder, happy that the pain was now completely gone. Olivia walked down the sidewalk, enjoying the cool air before they had to head to the airport to head back home. It was their last day and Colin had left early that morning to finish up his business.

Hearing her phone ping, she plunged her hand in and extracted her phone. Colin.

What’s my girl doing? -C

Olivia smiled.

Missing you. Walking, and enjoying the fresh air. How’s work? -O

Would much rather be with you right now. Those heels are beautiful on you, by the way. I should have said that this morning. -C

You tell me how cute I am all the time. Don’t beat your handsome head up about it too much, ok? Gotta go. Cause trouble for me. -O

I’ll burn this country down for you if you ask me. -C

Olivia bit her cheek with a little laugh. She sent him a brief video clip of a woman swooning as a reply and put her phone back into her purse as she entered the luxurious store.

Looking around, she contemplated. What could a man who has everything, want?

She bit her lip, heading hesitantly to the cologne section, refusing help from a young gentleman who appeared at her side. She took her time, going through every scent until she found the perfect one. Turning, she walked to the tie section and grabbed a green one, hoping that he’d wear it and think of her.

Olivia then meandered over to the grooming area and pursued the multitude of serums, oils, cases of small combs, brushes, and small scissors. She took her time and handpicked a few things she thought Colin might like. She walked to the register gave it all to the young man to ring up.

Slightly wincing at the price, she pulled out her personal card and gave it to him to swipe. Colin gave her a card to use for other expenses, but she wanted to buy this with money she felt she’d earned.

Swallowing the wave of nausea that came with making a big purchase. Lightly sweating, she picked up the gift bag and bid the clerk goodbye before heading out the door. Passing a florist, she went in there as well, buying a few fresh bouquets of flowers and a vase.

With a self-satisfied yet nervous sigh, she headed back to the hotel with her purchases.

Back in the hotel room, Olivia stood in her bare feet in the blue full-service kitchen and clipped the flowers, placing them carefully in the vase. She’d never had the luxury of buying flowers or making an arrangement, and she savored the experience. She swayed slightly, listening to a song play on her phone while sipping her chilled white wine.

She glanced across the space and at the nightstand in the bedroom where Colin’s gifts were tucked away and wondered how he’d react once he saw them. She furrowed her eyebrows before suddenly paling, wondering if the gifts were too plain, too functional. He’d been gifting her with jewels, clothes, and elaborate things. And she bought him a tie.

Fighting fresh feelings of inadequacy, Olivia wrapped her arms around her torso, lost in thought.

Moments later, Colin rounded the corner with his dark blue suit jacket across his arm. Spotting her, his steps slowed as he took in the expression on her face. Her features were melancholy, seemingly drawn tight with worry. So lost within herself, she didn’t notice his presence, too absorbed deep in thought.

“Olivia,” Colin called quietly, not wanting to scare her. Despite his calmness, she jumped in surprise anyway. His brow furrowed slightly.

“Oh,” Olivia bit out a strained noise, putting a hand to her throat. He walked closer and dumped his wallet and phone onto the countertop. “I didn’t hear you come in, I’m so sorry,” her features changed quickly, breaking out into a smile.

Colin arched an eyebrow. “What were you thinking about just now?” he asked curiously, trying to keep the question from sounding like an order. He was genuinely curious, because he did not like that look on her face at all and wanted to avoid it at all costs moving forward.

“Nothing, nothing important,” Olivia breathed. In an attempt to reassure him, she reached out to touch his arm gently. Colin bristled, knowing she was lying.

“Hmm-hmm,” Colin hummed, reaching over to grab a glass and a bottle of whiskey, and poured himself two fingers. He sipped slowly, his eyes regarding hers tightly.

“Uhm, look,” Olivia said with feigned interest, pushing the vase of flowers in front of her closer to him. “Do you like it?” her voice was shy, causing Colin to give her a tight roving glance over her face, assessing her features with interest.

“Of course, I do. You know I love flowers,” he responded tightly. His mother used to keep flowers all over their house. “Where did you get them? They’re beautiful,” he continued the pleasant exchange with difficulty, not wanting to let her lie go. Struggling with the need to lash out and make her acknowledge her feelings.

Not going there yet. Not in a hotel, we have a plane to catch, we’re in a different county, I can’t afford to scare her, I’m not ready. She won’t trust me, I’m feeling too much to introduce her into this the wrong way and fuck her up, Colin ran through a list of reasons as to why he was denying himself. But all he could imagine was him wrapping his hand around her throat and telling her to choose between breathing and telling the truth.

“I put it together myself,” proud, she reached forward to maneuver a flower slightly. “There’s a little flower shop a few blocks down. I went…shopping,” she mumbled hesitantly, her eyes flickering to his, then back to the arrangement shyly.

Colin paused, immediately letting the irritation go.

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