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“It isn’t what?—”
Taylan cuts Knox off before he can continue. “What was the memory?” This is the first time Taylan has used such a firm tone with me and it’s kind of shocking.
“It was just a flash,” I mutter bitterly.
“Explain it to me, Lay,” Taylan pleads. All the air whooshes out of me and my shoulders slowly deflate.
“Knox was…” I dart my gaze away, unable to look at them as I speak. “Knox told me I take your cock well and when I looked away from him I saw your face. That was it, I didn’t see anything else.” Shame washes over me, I wish that flashback was just a trick but I know what I saw was real. Taylan and I have slept together and Knox allowed it. Taylan steps forward. Knox grabs at him but he bats his hands away as he comes to stand in front of me. He places his hands on my shoulders and I cringe as the memory of him thrusting inside me replays in my mind.
“Lay, what you saw wasn’t something depraved or dirty.” I swing my gaze back to him and scoff. “Without you remembering everything this is going to be hard to believe but, can you just try to keep an open mind?” The plea in his voice is the only reason I nod. “You and I have only slept together three times—” I jerk out of his hold.
“Three times?” I screech. Knox moves forward but Taylan shoots him a look that has him stopping in his tracks.
“Yes,” he says, drawing my attention back to him. “All three times Knox has been present, you won’t believe me but this was what you wanted.” I gasp.
“I wouldn’t… No?—”
Knox cuts off my rambling. “Knowing what you know about me now, do you really think I would let anyone touch you if it wasn’t what you wanted?” I balk at him.
“You are seriously kidding, right? You were a fucking asshole to me when we met?—”
“No, I wasn’t. I was a dick to you this time because I thought you had killed my sister and ran off to help your daddy. I would never allow anyone to hurt you, Lakeland. Did I allow anyone to touch you aside from me?” I ponder his words for a second and begrudgingly shake my head.
“Lake, the three times we were together it was consensual, you wanted it.” I open my mouth to argue but Taylan pushes on. “Don’t get me wrong, I was a willing participant. You wanted to embrace a… kink if you will and Knox being the jealous, possessive asshole he is, wouldn’t allow anyone to touch you until you asked me.”
My jaw unhinges and my eyes widen. “I asked you?” He gives me a tight lip smile and nods.
“Yeah, Lay, you came to me. Knox only agreed because he knew I would never hurt you or do anything you didn’t like. You both trusted me to care for you and not treat the gift you gave willingly like some cheap fuck.” I scrunch my face in disgust. “I would never hurt you, Lay. Have I not shown you that? Have I not shown you that I am a friend not only to Knox but to you as well?” I can’t argue because he is right. Taylan has shown me nothing but kindness and I am grateful to him for that because his kindness was one of the only things that kept me fighting for my freedom from Knox.
“I wanted this?” I repeat, looking at each of them.
“Yeah baby, this was something I wasn’t okay with at the start. I’ll never be okay with sharing you but after you explained things to me, I understood.” Knox’s words settle me and make me feel like what I did wasn’t something to be embarrassed about.
“What if I wanted to do it again?”
Knox
I stare at her like she is out of her fucking mind. Tay stands beside me, rubbing the back of his neck, looking all kinds of fucking awkward. Taylan sleeping with Lake was something I was okay with before but it isn’t something I can stomach now. Was it fucking hot to watch my best friend make my girl come? Fuck yes, it was, and I enjoyed myself but the last time ended in us in a threesome and that was fucking euphoric, then two nights later I lost my sister and Lakeland. Thinking about her and Taylan together brings me back to that night and I won’t do it, I can’t.
I meet her gaze as I speak. “If that is something you want, what you really want then I can’t give it to you.” Her mouth parts slightly. “Before that was something I was okay with but now, no. I won’t allow anyone to touch what is mine and make no fucking mistake, kitten, you are mine.”
“Well that’s good because I was fucking with you.” I gape at the dirty little minx. Tay laughs and claps.
“What?” I snarl annoyed as fuck.
She shrugs. “Don’t get me wrong, Taylan is hot–” I growl. “But I’m not interested in whatever that was.”
“Babe, you’ll get sick of his mediocre cock soon enough and be begging to have mine just so you can feel what it’s like to be fucked by a real man.” I smack Taylan over the back of the head, Lay and him laugh and within a couple of seconds I join them as I wrap my arms around my girl and hold her close. Tay smiles and nods, telling me without words that he will never bring this topic up again or ever accept an offer to repeat history should she ever ask. “Right, well since we have decided that Knox has sharing issues and ruined what should have been our midnight snack, I’ll see you both in the morning.”
“Night,” I say as Lay pulls out of my hold and closes the space between her Taylan. When he looks down at her I can see the love he feels toward her in his eyes but it’s the love of a… Brother? It feels weird thinking that after we just talked about them fucking.
“I may not remember it but out of everyone, I’m glad it was Tay because I know without a shadow of doubt you have taken care of me and treated me with respect.” Tay gives her a tight lipped smile, then she shocks the fuck out of both of us when she wraps her arms around his waist and hugs him. Two seconds, that’s all it took for him to melt into her.
“I would never hurt you, Lay. I got your back, always,” he says as he releases her and places a kiss to her cheek before walking out. That right there is one of the many reasons why I fucking love him and Xander, they are my brothers and always have my back. I don’t know what the fuck is eating at Xander but I plan to find out whatever the fuck it is in the morning.
“So…” Lake says as she makes her way over to me, stopping a couple inches away. “I guess without my meds, I’m slowly starting to get my memories back.” I nod and try with all my might to snuff out that spark of hope inside me.
“With or without those memories, you will always be my Lakeland.” Her eyes soften at my words. “You may not recall our past but I do. I’ll spend every day reminding you of the reasons why you fell in love with me the first time. Until the time you do remember, I will love you enough for the both of us.” She covers her mouth with her hand as tears fill her eyes.
