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Kasey flashes me a small smile as she pushes up on her knees and scoots toward me.
I gulp and dart a panicked look to the side, seeking out Mason before I can stop myself.
But he’s paying me no attention. He’s leaning toward Izzy, whispering something in her ear. My sister shakes her head, her face reddening. Jaw set.
I know that look.
She’s being stubborn about something. Defensive.
And Mason… He looks annoyed. His jaw is set too, but his only does that when he’s biting something back. Restraining himself.
“It’s okay.”
I meet Kasey’s soft blue gaze. She shrugs, and leans forward pecking me on the lips. There and gone so fast, it doesn’t even occur to me until she’s already sitting back down that I just had my first kiss.
My mouth fumbles for something—words, air, a magic spell that will turn me into a bird so I could fly out of here. I feel her kiss more now after the fact than I did when it happened.
Soft.
Light.
Not bad, but not good. Not like how they make it look in movies, all epic and heart-stopping.
Not like the kisses I sometimes dream about with faceless, bodiless figures distorted by shadows and starlight. The ones I wake up from clutching at my chest and staring up at the ceiling with a lump in my throat when I realize it wasn’t real.
That feeling… so vivid, so certain in my dreams. So solid…
This kiss was nothing compared to that.
Because this girl is nothing to you.
“JJ, it’s your turn.”
Tugged from my thoughts, I meet my sister’s gaze across the circle, my eyes and throat burning. If the way the wounded sort of realization flickering across her face is anything to go by, it’s more than obvious how upset I am. Disappointed and enraged and hurt.
She can be pushy and selfish at times, sure. But she’s never been outright cruel. Does she even realize how messed up this?
Something tells me she doesn’t.
Or, at least, she didn’t.
Too late now, I think bitterly as I lean forward and grab the bottle, just as she’s about to say something. I spin it so hard it’s a wonder it doesn’t go flying across the room like a frisbee.
I kind of wish it did, if only to distract everyone so I can get out of here.
Feeling numb inside, I watch as the spinning slows, drawing to a stop…
Right along with my heart.
The world…
Time…
Everything grinds to a halt.
My gaze slowly lifts from the red-capped bottle to the body it points at, skating up the black jeans, band tee, clenched jaw, and then finally landing on Mason’s too-wide eyes.
Someone cheers, another laughs, someone claps their hands, and another scoffs.
