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I sigh. “He probably hates me now. I was horrible to him the last few days.”
“Most things can be forgiven where there’s love. With me and Ishmael, I went away for years without any way to reach me. And he still took me back. You’ve been moody to him for, what, a few days?”
My mind still seizes on the word ‘love.’ As if that’s even possible now. It’s such a huge word.
“Yeah, but we don’t have that history.”
“You don’t?” She looks at me seriously, like a strict school teacher.
“Oh, right. We do.”
She smiles, then begins gesturing a little more calmly. “What does your heart tell you?”
I’m still waiting for every new word that comes out of her mouth like my life depends on it.
“I don’t know. I just wish I knew how…”
She deliberates, fighting with herself. “How… he feels you mean?”
I nod slowly.
I look down at the can of grape soda, and the thought of it entering my stomach nauseates me.
I can barely look at her face. I’m too afraid of what it’ll reveal about Cedrick’s feelings, or lack of them.
“I really shouldn’t…”
“Shouldn’t what?” I pounce on her, ready to strike.
“Well…I don’t want to betray…”
“Sister-in-law code.”
She laughs to herself and sighs. “So, I happen to know the reason why Cedrick is out with Ishmael right now.”
“Because he hates me?”
She laughs even harder. “No. To have the exact same conversation you’re having with me right now.”
I swivel my head back up to her so quickly, I make myself dizzy. “What?”
“If you’d just talk to each other, you’d figure it out quickly. So go talk to each other, please. I can’t be the intermediary.”
I gawk at her. “How do you know that?”
She smiles. “Are you going to drink that soda?”
I shake my head. She picks it up and chugs it. My mind is running so fast, I’m making myself more nauseated.
If he felt the exact same way I did, then I’ve not only been rejecting him, but humiliating him, too. How come he wouldn’t just walk out? Does he feel stuck with me because of the baby?
But if Cedrick were a jerk to me, I can’t imagine not forgiving him. But this much of a jerk? Yeah.
Liza sets the empty can back on the table. “I can get you another one if you want,” she says apologetically.
“It’s fine. My stomach hates it anyway.”
“So, how do you think I know? Ishmael told me. And also, when I see the two of you together…it’s pretty obvious.”
