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Chapter 1
Collins
We begin life filled with such hope. Possibilities exist even amidst the greatest struggles.
Today is a perfect day to do nothing. So, that’s what I’m doing. Currently, I’m in a hammock swinging along with the breeze. The sun peeks through the passing clouds and between the leaves of the palm trees that hang over the sand, just before the waves of the ocean kiss the shore. The sound of the crashing surf rouses my memories filled with laughter. My mother’s loving giggle fills my ears. “Oh, Collin’s my Collins,” she would sing. My brother Lawson teases me about being a momma’s girl, but I don’t care. Leland, my other older brother, came to my rescue. They rough-housed and face slapped each other so Leland could put Lawson in his place. My mother preferred to keep it neutral but always gave into Lawsons cries. Secretly giving Leland a wink while comforting her second-born son, she handled us so effortlessly.
I miss her gentle touch so much. Nothing compares to the feeling when I laid my head on her lap while she gently stroked the wild hair from my face. My blonde hair ratted from the day spent with my best friend, Massey, at the beach attempting to surf. She would whisper words of encouragement for the next day.
At night, I’d hear her remind Leland to keep a watchful eye on me every time I would run into the surf. Releasing a grunt, he would agree. In the next room, I’d pull up my favorite blanket that had holes throughout. Though living in Hawaii, there is no need for blankets because of the perfect weather year-round. There are some nights when the ocean breeze blows just right and sends a chill through the air. Our home was small. Broken windows, cracked tiles, and an overgrown yard. We lived in a low-income area where we depended on our neighbors like our own family. Together, we helped others and treated others how you would want to be treated. We were fiercely loyal and created an unspoken bond from being penniless but surviving.
Despite barely making ends meet, having a mom like her made it easy not to worry about that. She made life magical. Taking the left-over napkins from one of her side jobs, she cut out shapes as best she could with dull scissors. Before she put me to bed, we would lie on my bare mattress while she held the tattered napkin in front of the window. Her hands would tip back and forth, causing the light to burst through the frayed holes. She’d hum a sweet melody, lulling me to sleep.
Still, to this day, money means nothing to me. I’ll live the rest of my life giving everything I have to take care of my mom. Her mind has become lost in this world after an unfortunate accident.
I lazily strum my ukulele, spurring more memories, the reason for my lips to rise into a somber smile. Every struggle I’ve endured brought me to my knees with an uncanny humbleness. My mind begs for normalcy. I’m jealous of how much easier life is for others. I want to be comfortable buying things without the terrible feeling of over-drafting my account or feel judged by others for my savvy bartering.
With all the heaviness in the world, and in my heart, there are two places where my mind falls into complete peace. The beach and my brother’s garage.
My phone rings, and my best friend’s name is displayed on the screen. Have you ever found a person who, when you see their notification on your screen, your face lights up? I have, that’s Massey. She’s just everything good in this world.
Big waves.
Massey always has the perfect timing.
Big rewards. I’ll see you tonight.
Jumping up from my hammock, I flop on the ground. Chuckling at my clumsiness, I quickly stand and run toward my house to gather my surf bag and board. The promise of sun, surf, and Massey has me giddy with joy. A welcome release from the painful but loving recollections that filter through my mind daily.
I stand, brushing the sand from my body, carefully lay the ukulele on the tattered fabric of the hammock, and dance my way to my small bungalow. Many people consider it an overbuilt shed, but hey, it’s mine. I’ve come from nothing, so this tiny space of heaven is everything I could ever want. At least for right now. I love it here in Hawaii. I live in paradise. Life is simple and sweet.
Chapter 2
Collins
Sweat drips down my body, covering the grease I’ve accumulated while trying to fix this axle on a Volkswagen. It’s been a piece to deal with. I prefer American-made cars to work on instead of these international cars. Their complexity makes them harder to fix and takes more time.
Tightening a bolt on this hunk of junk, I can’t help but look over my shoulder at my dream car. I searched high and low for this 1970 Chevelle. I found her when I was at a junkyard looking for spare parts to stock in Leland’s shop. I refer to this car as a ‘she’ since she was singing for me. She is my girl.
Some people think it’s weird that a girl is a mechanic, but cars are all I know. Lawson and I have been working with Leland since we were kids. Our dad ran off with a new girlfriend when I was a kid, never looking back. My mom was in a terrible car accident. She survived, but with a traumatic brain injury, there wasn’t much of ‘her’ left. She’s barely mobile, hasn’t spoken a word, and her eyes look hollow. Her sky-blue eyes show no recognition of anyone. Even when she looks at us, her kids.
Without a second thought, Leland stepped up to take care of us. He worked as a mechanic for Mr. Lee in high school. Mr. Lee took him under his wing and taught him everything he could. Leland worked every single day until Mr. Lee’s untimely passing. Now he runs Mr. Lee’s garage. Lawson and I naturally followed in Leland’s footsteps and worked alongside him. It surprised me how quickly I picked up the skills needed to do this job. Tiny hands can reach some of the most impossible places in an engine.
Leland walks in the back door of the tiny workshop and makes his way to the front lobby. He lives in an extremely small studio apartment that is attached to the building out back. He lives and breathes this place. Lawson is nursing a hangover in the corner. His disheveled, deep brown hair and his normally tan skin pales from the amount of anxiety he carries day after day.
“Collins. Is that Volkswagen ready?” Leland yells from the front. He pokes his head around the doorframe to look at what I am doing.
“Yeah, it’s good,” I responded.
“Sweet. I’ll call the owner and let him know.” His voice muffles as he walks away from the shop door.
I climb into the car and drive it around to the front so the owner knows it’s ready. Quickly, I wipe the car down to make sure there is no oil or dirt left over when I see my best friend, Massey, parking her car. We’ve been best friends since grade school. She’s always been my person. Someone I could run to when life felt like it was swallowing me whole. Though we are from different worlds, she’s never made me feel anything other than accepted. Even her father would turn a blind eye when I snuck into their house in the middle of the night. I couldn’t stand the parties my brothers would have or be alone when they worked late or went out with friends. Sometimes she even slipped food in my bag.
Unfortunately, Lawson still lingers in this party stage but doesn’t go out nearly as much as he used to. Leland wasn’t that bad, but he worked all the time. That minor fact hasn’t changed.
Massey skips toward me with the biggest smile. Her dark brown hair blows wild in the wind. “Collins! Clean lines across the surf. It’s begging to be ridden. Ready to go?”
“Yeah, let me clock out,” I say as Massey follows me inside.
