AllFreeNovel
Share Us
Kuru didn’t look at the card, but nodded with certainty. "De moon, yes?"
“How did you know?" I asked.
"I see tings dat dose wid eyes do not. When we stop lookin' wid our eyes, we feel tings as dey were meant ta be felt.” She reached down, her hand spreading out across it, still not looking at it. "And dese cards, I's done had dem all my life. Dey’s been in de family for a long time. My grandmama hand-painted dem herself. And she passed dem down to my mama. And now, dey belongs to me. I knows dem more dan I knows myself. I can feel dem." She patted it lovingly, like an old friend, “Now, de most important ting about dis card is dis."
She paused and I couldn’t help but lean in towards her, listening carefully, as she placed her hand over her chest. "How do you feel about dis card?"
I took in a sharp inhalation of breath, not knowing until this very moment that there was a cutting sensation across my midriff. The warmth of a gushing sensation, as if my innards were spilling outwards.
I couldn't speak. Only feel.
"Say de words, child."
"Guilt," the words sounded acerbic on my tongue, burned in my throat. Hot. Sharp. "Shame."
She nodded, "Yes," her gaze softened and her finger crooked. “Come here, chile. Come to me."
I, hesitatingly, awkwardly, got to my feet and came to stand next to her.
"Now," she took my hand, pulling me down and, following her motion, got to my knees so that we were face to face. She cupped my cheeks, staring intently into my eyes. It wasn't strange to look into her white eyes anymore. It felt almost more...intimate. As if only looking at the diseased part, was I truly seeing life for what it was. “Sometin you must understand. It was not your fault."
Tears sprang to my eyes, followed by a burning sensation.
“It's all an illusion. Tings ain't what dey seem. You need to uncover de truth to heal.”
“But I.." I tried to argue, because… because it was my fault. She didn’t understand.
“Dese things were beyond your control.” Her voice was firm. "Not. your. fault."
I was choking on the guilt that was pouring from me. Mother killer. Mother killer.
Kuru’s fingers tightened on my cheekbones. “You've got to find a way to see de truth, girl. It's locked up inside here," she tapped on my forehead, "and if you don't unlock it, you done never goin to be happy. Trust me, I knows."
There was a sadness to her that was suddenly overwhelming and overpowering, and she released me, shaking her head. "I knows. Now, Rook, come take her."
Rook pulled me up and into his lap, cradling me in his arms. His fingers soothed over me, my hair, my face, my shoulders, murmuring softly, “It’s okay. Everything will be okay. I’ll make sure of it.”
We sat like that for a long moment, neither one of them rushing me as my mind raged, my breath trembled, jagged echoes from my own guilt wrapping around me—a suffocating storm in the dim room. I squeezed my eyes shut, trying to keep the memories down.
“Shhh,” Rook comforted me, his fingertips soft and sweet and gentle, brushing across my skin. “We’ll work this out. It’ll be okay.”
Would he really stick with me? If he knew the truth?
His calm assurance became a lifeline, pulling me from the edge. The storm in my chest relented, guilt's grip slowly loosening.
After a long while, Kuru stood. "Wait here. I needs to give you something."
She easily passed through the curtain, showing that she did, indeed, not need any help getting around.
"Are you okay?” Rook’s concerned gaze was on me.
"I just..." I tried to put my feelings into words, "I haven't thought about it in a long time. And now I…I…”
“That's okay," Cupping my cheeks, he kissed me, slow, soft and sweet. "We'll work it out."
I nodded, leaning into his touch, loving the warmth billowing inside me. “Thank you."
The curtain parted again, and Kuru returned with something small in her hand. She held it out to me. "Now, dis is for you." It looked similar to a voodoo doll. "Dis not bad," she explained, shaking both her head and her finger, "dis good. It's a poppet. Jibber babber.”
