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I won’t be the thing that keeps them from getting what they want. What they need.
The afternoon fades away. My assistant eventually stops calling. My cell phone lies inert on my desk, battery drained. I haven’t left my desk, because if I do I’ll have to take action, and the only choice left before me is the one I feared from the start.
They’re better off without me. Both of them. If I’d stayed away like I was supposed to, Hale House would be doing just fine and Callahan wouldn’t have to be defending the business she built out of grief and necessity, through her own sheer force of will. Raleigh can follow his chosen line of work without worry. They’d both go on with their lives without one interfering bastard with an ax to grind messing up their chances at happiness. Callie would have Finn back. I’d have Finn back.
Not that I can fix that part now.
But if I take myself out of the equation, maybe I can fix the rest.
28
Callahan
Raleigh and I stagger out of the back door of Hale House, giggling like a couple of teenagers ditching school. He takes my hand and lets me lead him across the wide yard, toward my house. Finn’s truck is gone, but that’s nothing new, not even for the last couple of weeks. I haven’t spoken to him since the day he told me he was moving out, but I still see him going up and down the stairs to his apartment every now and then. Raleigh keeps telling me to give it time.
“He’s your brother, of course he’ll come around,” says Raleigh. Sometimes I let myself believe it.
For now, I push the ache aside, ready to drag one of my lovers to bed even though it’s still technically business hours and I should still probably be at work. One look at Raleigh and his gorgeous, flushed face has me picking up the pace to get to the house.
West is sitting on the steps of my front porch, his head in his hands.
“Well, this is a surprise,” I say, smiling. “We thought you were working until… West. West, what’s wrong?”
He doesn’t look up. He brings his hands down and slowly comes to his feet.
“What’s going on?” says Raleigh. West still doesn’t say anything, but he looks at us both.
He looks heartbroken.
“Oh, honey, what happened?” I ask, rushing forward. I’m picturing another car accident, maybe one of his sisters—
West holds up a hand before I can get my arms around him.
“I just wanted to tell you in person,” he says, his voice flat, devoid of expression. “This isn’t working for me.”
“What isn’t?” asks Raleigh, the confusion on his face growing.
“This.” West gestures between the three of us. “I’m sorry. I just. Thought I should tell you. In person.”
“You sound like a goddamned robot,” I say, disbelief warring with anger. And grief, sudden and overwhelming and hanging over my head like a tsunami about to crash. “What the hell is going on?”
“Nothing,” says West.
“So that’s… what?” says Raleigh. I can hear his anger now, too. “That’s just it? It’s over? No explanation. Just done.”
West nods, his eyes on his car.
“Jesus. Look at him, Raleigh,” I say, unable to keep the sneer out of my voice. The tsunami is still there, getting closer every second as I feel West pulling further and further out of our reach. “He can’t wait to get away from us.”
West’s throat moves, and I think maybe I’ve gotten an honest reaction out of him. But he doesn’t speak; he just stands there with his hands shoved in his pockets, eyes locked somewhere off in the distance.
“Fine,” I say, waving both hands. “You’ve had one foot out the door since the start of this whole goddamned thing, West. You want to go, I’m not going to stop you.”
I storm up the steps, not bothering to look at West as I pass him, and let the screen door slam shut behind me. From the kitchen window, I see Raleigh stop and look up at him, trying to… what? Trying to work it out, I think. But after a moment, he walks past West without saying another word, following me up into the house and shutting the door behind him.
West stands there, his hands still stuffed in his goddamned pockets, for long minutes after we’ve come into the house. My treacherous heart flares with hope, thinking he might have changed his mind, that maybe he’s going to come in, tell us it was a mistake, that he’s not leaving. That he’s never leaving.
Then West climbs into his car and drives off. The tsunami hits then, sending me sliding down the front of the cabinets, my arms wrapped around my middle like if I hold on hard enough maybe I won’t fall to pieces.
