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I wished for light.
What I needed was my light. A pinprick of light had grown in my heart-center over the three weeks I stayed with the Eilian. The amount was so diminutive the light couldn’t be harnessed, but I thanked my stars I possessed even that small amount.
I rubbed my stomach. The babe was growing, although a bump was not yet showing. I didn’t tell my kind hosts anything about my pregnancy.
The plan was to leave before anyone found out.
I kept touching my neck, feeling for my dragon stone. I prayed with all my might that Kenrik had summoned Seren and she’d take him to Gorlassar.
Kenrik. Oh, Kenrik.
My light was in a mortal. It had given him greater strength. Healed him nearly instantly. What will become of you? How long would Caedryn pursue him? How long would the bond last between them? I wanted to save Kenrik from my life, from loving me. I wanted to keep from being a rift between him and his family.
With my light in him, he couldn’t go home. He’d endanger his family. He couldn’t visit Brenin again. A marriage with Tiwlip was impossible.
I’m so sorry, Kenrik. Forgive me. Deian, please forgive me. I’ve doomed everyone I’ve come to love.
The worst heartbreak was my broken bond between Seren and me. Would I ever see her again? I was no longer a dragon guardian. I no longer felt that kinship with her. She no longer possessed my unending life. Maybe Kenrik would return the stone to Seren, and she could start again. I should have told him to do that.
So many regrets. I was doing everything wrong.
I shouldn’t have left Gorlassar.
It was entirely too late to have foolish wishes. The only way to go was forward.
I felt peace in that small decision.
SEVENTY-TWO
I stayed with my generous hosts for four weeks before I asked Hadyn to take me west. We traveled for two weeks through the Great Forest’s canopy, by the maze of bridges, until we came to the Great Ridge. A rough-hewn path was carved across the ridge’s top, connecting the two sides of the forest. The Eilian were the only people to tread this way, except for the occasional small, four-legged, furry animal. The trees on either side of the ridgetop trail were deciduous, and though spring wasn’t quite underway, the trail was free of snow.
I endured a rickety descent—one I hoped to never do again—by lift in West Eilian Village. By the second weeks’ end, I said farewell to Hadyn at the edge of the Great Forest.
As the trees became normal sized, I felt a huge release. Caedryn was two dense forests and a mountain ridge behind me. The fresh air filled my nostrils. I walked carefully and casually, noticing the green buds on the trees. The forest floor was smooth with sparse growth, so passage was effortless.
Hadyn gave me a crossbow so I could hunt for food. I carried that and my pack slung over my shoulders. I wore an extra-heavy cloak because my light had not recovered enough to keep me warm.
I still felt mortal.
It took time for scratches to heal. I was cautious crossing the bridges and cutting vegetables. I stepped firmly on the ground to avoid spraining my ankles. I drank more and ate a lot, not forgetting that the babe in my womb required me to do so anyway.
Crossing the ridge signaled passing into “wee” Brenin’s realm, as Hadyn had said. By my estimation, I was three weeks from the capital. Brenin and Tiwlip would return home as the weather warmed. I debated going there. I debated trekking even farther south until I found Tarren, Owein’s home.
No. I turned north toward the coastal plains.
Up ahead, through the trees, a fur-covered figure crouched in the underbrush. He fiddled with a knife, and as I approached, he was skinning a fox.
“Do you plan on turning that into a hat or a pair of gloves?” I asked. “You know, I never liked wearing fur. It’s—”
“A rotten carcass you wouldn’t be caught dead wearing,” the man said.
“How’d you know?”
The man peered from under his cap and wiped his hands on a rag. “Only one person has ever criticized my furs. And don’t think for one second that I’d forget her voice or her face.”
Those blue eyes. I stared. A close-cropped beard covered the man’s face, and hair poked out around the cap, nearly concealing his face. His coat was thick but worn. His fingertips stuck out from fingerless gloves. I recognized his knife, the one he kept in his boot.
Even under the rugged exterior, his eyes were unmistakable.
