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“Is this what they do in the city? Make-out with whoever they want with no regard for the consequences?”
“Of-of course not.”
“Then tell me,” he grits through his teeth, his eyes wide in anger and hurt. “How could you go from my sister one day to me the next? I just found her crying in the house, heartbroken because you’ve been playing with her.”
My heart is thumping for all the wrong reasons, the thoughts in my head a jumbled mess. “I-I wasn’t playing her…”
“Wasn’t playing? So your intentions towards her were real?”
“No, it… it just happened.”
“Just like you just happened to be with me,” he snarls.
“I was never going to be with you,” I bark back, and immediately regret my words.
“What is that supposed to mean?”
“I don’t know, I don’t know what’s going on.” I breathe heavily through my nose, my jaw clenched shut. I hate every word that’s come out of my mouth, hate the confusion in my head—in my chest.
“Fuck this,” Trevor says quietly, his normally sparkling eyes dull.
The anger drains from me. My stomach churns, cramping up as if I’m about to be sick. Trevor shakes his head and all I want to do is wipe the anguish from his face as he whispers, “I was too obsessed with getting some that I didn’t see that Julie’s feelings were true.” I flinch. Is that all I was to him? Some ass? “I thought… I thought it was only a bit of flirting between you and Julie. And I went after the bloke that she liked. The man that she’s kissed. I’ve hurt my family yet again.”
“Trevor—”
His voice is defeated when he interrupts. “I think it’s best you leave.”
“What?” A bull just rammed my gut. Why does this hurt more than seeing my family board the plane?
Trevor turns his head away from me. “I don’t want to cause Julie more hurt. She’s suffered enough.”
“I didn’t mean to hurt her.”
He closes his eyes for a long time.
“Even if you didn’t mean to, it still happened. And… even if it wasn’t for Julie… I don’t have time for this, Jamie.”
“Time for what?”
“Time to hold your hand while you figure out what you want.”
I open my mouth, but the words that I want to say are lodged in my throat.
I guess he’s right. I’m not ready for this.
14
The Walls Close In
The apartment is more claustrophobic than the tent.
Adam is back with his mum. He’s started school. I see him even less than before.
I stare at the white walls my landlord told me not to paint.
Bright blue eyes.
The ticking of the clock sounds on top of the never-ending hum of traffic from the road.
