AllFreeNovel
Share Us
I nod. “When she was a young woman. Mid-twenties, I think. It was just before she married Grandpa.”
And then, just like that, I’m lost again.
Memory lane takes a turn. In my mind, I wander into my grandmother’s hospital room, where she stayed for two weeks before she passed away.
A quilt my mother sewed by hand covers the bed. Bouquets of flowers line the window sill and crowd onto the rolling bedside table, leaving just enough room for the Styrofoam cup of tea that she always had on hand.
It’s the night that she fell asleep for the final time. I’m alone in the room with her while Mom and Clay are off in the cafeteria for dinner. I know Gran’s time is running short. I sit by her bed and hold her hand.
“Gwen, honey, you know I don’t like to impose.”
“Of course, Gran.”
“But if I could… just this once… I want to ask something of you.”
“Anything, Grandma.”
“Do something for me. I know it will be difficult because it doesn’t come cheap. But find a way. Stay in the Queen’s Room, up at the castle. I did when I was young like you. I spent every last penny on the reservation, too.”
Her voice sounds croaky. “Back then, it was a fraction as much. You know how money is; a soda used to cost nothing but a couple quarters.”
“I know.” I squeeze her hand, then offer her some tea.
She waves the cup away. “Thank you, love, but not right now. I better get this out before I forget. Memories come and go, and this one’s a good one.”
She winks at me. “A fun one.”
“I’m all ears.”
“Well, there I was, a young woman. I had barely anything in the bank. My Pop told me to spend it on good winter boots, a winter coat, and repairs on the old car I was tootin’ around in. Well, all that sure would have been practical, but it wasn’t what I needed. And when you’re like us, Gwen… when you tend to think with your heart instead of your head, you can’t do what’s practical all the time.”
I laugh because she’s so right.
She smiles at me, happy that I understand. “So, ‘course, I took all the money out and rang up the front desk at the castle and booked that room, all for me. Just me. No one understood it, least of all my father. But in my heart, I was getting a tug to do that for myself. I didn’t know why.”
“And… what happened?”
“It changed my life.”
“How, Gran?”
“That room—it works magic in your soul. That’s how. Let me see… Let me try to explain it to you. Well, I woke up in that bed, Gwen, and I felt like a real queen. Like I was worthy. Worthy to be alive, worthy to get all the love in the world, and give love, too. Worthy of the sunlight and seeing flowers and to have sugar dance on my tongue. I’d never felt all that before. I always played small. Much smaller than I should’ve. I didn’t feel any of the joys of life, the sweetness, because I couldn’t let myself. But that morning…”
She turns her hand in mine and squeezes my palm tightly, her grip firmer than I expect.
It’s not the grip of a frail elderly woman lying in a hospital bed.
It is a lively, strong grip that lets me know she really, really wants me to heed her words.
She keeps squeezing my hand as she goes on. “I see so much of myself in you. You’re so very humble, Gwen. It would be good for you to let yourself feel like a real queen for once. Get yourself that room, no matter what it takes. Wake up in that canopy bed and order a cup of tea and a nice breakfast, and then sit by those beautiful doors and look out at the view. You won’t want to put yourself last—to hide away, like you do—once you realize what you’re really worth. That’s what I want for you. I want you to know that you deserve all the love in the world.”
“I’ll do it,” I promise her.
She squeezes my hand one last time. “Good girl. I know you will.”
I remember how Clay and my mom returned soon after I made that promise. Clay played his guitar, and Mom and I sang a few songs with Grandma. That night, she passed away in her sleep.
I promised her that I would spend the night in the Queen’s Room, I think, as I tug at a frayed bit of yarn on the cuff of my sweater.
