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‘It’s bound to be a horror show,’ he says kindly. ‘Celeste has booked a pottery painting class. For four-year-olds! And apparently there’s going to be cucumber sandwiches. It’s got disaster written all over it.’
‘It’s very sweet that you’re trying to cheer me up.’
‘I feel bad. You know what, though? Celeste sent the invites out ages ago, way before we came up with our plan. I bet you any money Lila will be invited to the next party.’
I hope so, I think once I’ve hung up. For Lila’s sake.
Once my daughter has happily scaled every piece of apparatus in the playground, I scoop her up and whisk us both off to the supermarket, her favourite, where she gets to pick whatever she fancies for Sunday dinner.
Later, as we tuck into that classic Sunday meal of mac and cheese with garlic bread, I ask Lila if she’s looking forward to school tomorrow.
‘Yes,’ she says earnestly. ‘I like the book corner and all the crayons.’
‘And what about the people? Who are you looking forward to playing with?’
‘Sidney’s nice. And Margot.’
‘That’s great! Are they your best friends?’
‘Sometimes. What’s a playdate, Mummy?’
‘That’s where you invite your friends round to play. Would you like to do that?’
‘I’ll make a list,’ she says excitedly, grabbing a thick crayon and one of her unicorn notebooks and jotting down some scribbles. My heart pulls for my daughter. This is why I’m doing this thing with Joe, I remind myself. Lila is the centre of my world and it’s my duty to make sure that she gets the best experience out of school life. The sooner I’m best mates with the mums, the better.
Chapter 9
Tomorrow the Barnaby’s Babes are helping on the school park trip which means it will be a rare appearance for Joe at the school gates on a Tuesday. I couldn’t help but think about a rebrand of Thirsty Thursdays. The uncharitable option of Tosser Tuesdays pops into my mind but that doesn’t seem entirely fair. He’s actually not all bad. This will be our first outing together with people we know since Joe and I concocted this plan and now, as I prep Lila’s uniform ready for school tomorrow, I’m starting to get anxious. How are we going to play it? I decide it’s best if we coordinate our approach so I grab my phone and send him a message.
It’s our first public engagement tomorrow …
He replies instantly.
Sounds official
Will you be wearing some kind of regal sash?
You do give off Kate Middleton vibes
Seriously
Think we might need to be a bit friendlier in front of the other mums?
Can bring 12 red roses to the playground if you like?
Or my guitar and a love song I wrote for you
Why does it not surprise me that you own a guitar and write love songs
Whatever next? Standing in the rain telling me you hadn’t noticed?
You can mock me all you like, Rogers, but I will not have Four Weddings denigrated in my presence
I would never mock Four Weddings aka the best film ever. Just you
Well well well, looks like we’ve finally found something we agree on
Who’d have thought it!
