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With that, he bolts in the direction of the bathroom. While I wait I take another pastry until the next thing I know, Joe’s popping his head around the kitchen door.
‘The bathroom’s a crime scene, Sophie. I’m so sorry. And very embarrassed. I think I just need to sleep this off now. The spare room is ready for you if you want to stay?’
‘Thanks, Joe, I will. Stay hydrated, now,’ I say. Awkward conversations will have to wait.
So once again, Lila and I are having another sleepover at Joe’s house. It felt so normal that I didn’t even think twice about it. As I settle into Joe’s spare bed for the second time, I think about how much has changed in the last few months. I’m bonding with the school mums, my daughter is having lots of fun with another kid in class and I haven’t been pestered about my love life by Poppy in ages. There is, of course, the slight blip of tonight’s kiss but I am really hoping Joe clean forgets about it. Or even if he does remember, maybe he didn’t get the same sexy fireworks? For a brief moment I hope that he did. It definitely felt like he did. The way his lips grazed mine and …
STOP BEING SO FANCIFUL, SOPHIE! You’re not here for grazing lips!
This thing with Joe is a stepping stone to make my life completely man free, I remind myself. That’s why, if Joe remembers what happened, I hope he felt nothing. It keeps things much cleaner, which is how I like it. And if he asks, I’ll just explain I did it for the mums. Which is true. And he won’t ask if I enjoyed it, will he? No, he won’t.
I decide to chalk it up as a blip and focus on the positives, wiggling my toes under the covers and revelling in feeling like a weight has been lifted. The feeling of lightness seems to give me space for something else, too. The seed of a really bloody good idea. Denise’s baking has got me thinking and I am pretty sure there’s something I can do with Joe’s mum’s food. I sink into a peaceful sleep and dream about cookies.
Chapter 16
Mel is leaning against the school gates clutching a packet of pharmacy-grade paracetamol, handing them out to the rest of the parents as we arrive. I swear there’s a slight whiff of stale booze in the air as Joe and I approach the gang. I’d assumed I’d be dropping Lila and Sid off myself today, because Joe normally only does Thursdays, but he emailed work first thing to say he wouldn’t be going in until this afternoon. He’s standing next to me now, looking decidedly more crumpled than usual as he gratefully accepts Mel’s meds. Then he swallows them back without any water, the animal.
‘Daddy, why does your face look saggy today?’ Sid asks.
Joe flinches. ‘I stayed up past my bedtime. Could you dial it down a couple of decibels, Sid?’
Sid’s brows furrow and I smile at him. ‘Don’t worry, you weren’t shouting, Sid. Daddy’s just feeling a little delicate this morning.’
‘Aren’t we all,’ announces Celeste. She looks like she’s in mourning rather than hungover. She’s literally wearing a black veil over her face and a pair of black sunglasses underneath. It’s not sunny.
I stifle a giggle, feeling smug at my hangover-free state.
‘Wow, you guys look dreadful,’ Tally says cheerfully as she walks towards us.
‘How do you manage to look so fresh?’ Frankie scowls.
‘Firstly, Akoni has followed me back, so today is already a great day. Plus I did my usual post-booze regime. Haven’t you seen it on my channels?’ Tally asks, incredulous. ‘It’s one of my most popular posts. You start off with downing at least a pint of water when you get home. Then you hook yourself up to an IV vitamin drip to replace lost salts …’
‘Stop right there.’ Mel holds her hand up. ‘How on earth are you injecting yourself with vitamins? Do I even want to hear the answer to this? Do not do that, by the way.’
‘Oh I don’t do it myself! I called my dehydration team and they sent someone out last night,’ Tally explains, ignoring the fact that Mel is firmly explaining to the group that there’s no medical proof to back up the claims of vitamin drips.
Joe rubs his forehead. Today is clearly not his day for dealing with school gate spats.
‘Who has a dehydration team?’ Frankie asks me in a whisper.
I shrug. ‘How are you feeling?’
‘Not too bad,’ she says gingerly, like she doesn’t want to jinx it. ‘Maybe I should become an influencer too? I recommend a Maccie D’s on your way home from a night out. Much cheaper than a vitamin drip, I suspect. Thanks for looking after me and getting me home by the way.’
‘That’s what friends are for.’ I smile.
‘And also, you two,’ she says, pointing at me and Joe, ‘LOVED the steamy kiss on the dancefloor last night. So nice to see you guys as a proper couple rather than mum and dad at the school gates.’
Immediately I feel Joe tense.
‘Oh I …’ I am looking at Joe flailing slightly. What should I say, thanks?
‘Can I have a word?’ Joe says, dropping his voice so only I can hear.
‘Sure,’ I reply, my heart sinking even further as I follow him to my former hangout, the recycling bins.
Joe turns to give me a penetrating look.
