Page 32 of Vienna Bliss

“There’s more?”

Alena grinned. “I lay there for eighteen hours before anyone found me. I’d fallen in the night, and all that night there was no one and I couldn’t move. Then when the kids got there the next day it was too loud for anyone on a floor below me to hear. It wasn’t until after school that one of the custodians heard me, came up, and called 911.”

“My god, Alena.” The words burst from Alexander and he twisted to face her, grabbing her by the shoulders. “You shouldn’t…”

“Shouldn’t have been squatting in an attic? No. Though the punishment seemed a bit harsh for the crime.”

“That is not what I meant.” Alexander’s gaze searched her face. “Have you ever let anyone take care of you?”

She tensed. “I don’t need anyone to take care of me, and if telling you this story, a story I haven’t told anyone except my best friends makes you—”

“No.” He shook her gently. “That’s not…That’s not what I mean, because I mean…”

“Please finish that sentence,” she asked when the silence dragged on too long.

“You’re smiling as you tell me this story.”

“Better laughing than crying.”

“Why? Why do you always turn away when it’s time to cry?”

“I cried right now.” Her heart was beating fast, but she couldn’t quite say why.

“From physical pain. Not emotional.”

“Alexander, don’t do this. Don’t push me to open up. That’s not fucking fair.”

“Why?”

“Because you’re the one who’s pulling away. Putting up walls.”

“I’m not.”

“You are. You acted like…”

He hadn’t let go of her upper arms, and now he squeezed them. “Like?”

Alena closed her eyes. “That night in Moldova, the night Interpol got there?”

“In my bedroom.”

“Exactly.” She looked at him. “You held me. You took me to your bedroom, not a guest room. We slept beside one another, had breakfast and it felt…”

It felt like you loved me.

She wasn’t masochist enough to say it out loud, so she said something that wasn’t a lie, but wasn’t the whole truth. “It felt like we were partners, equals for the first time. It wasn’t about BDSM, at all, and if you bring up the collar I’ll snatch you bald-headed.”

Alexander blinked, then started to laugh. It was a soft, surprised chuckle. He released her upper arms and sat back, once more leaning against the legs of a chair, but then he put his arm around her shoulders and pulled her against him.

“Don’t do this if you don’t mean it,” Alena said almost desperately. “Don’t hold me, don’t be kind, just…don’t.”

“Partners,” Alexander said slowly. “To clarify, not play partners.”

“No. It felt like…you were the one person in the world I could count on. I could tell you anything because we were in it together and no matter how fucked up the situation got, we were going to be okay, because we had each other.”

Alexander was, predictably, quiet for a long time, but he kept his arm around her, and as the seconds became a minute, then two, she relaxed against him. Her knee still hurt, but it wasn’t sharp pain. It was a low throb that was much easier to deal with.

“I felt the same.” His words were low and gentle…loving?