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Tony was conscious of the wear and tear he saw when he looked at his mother, too. She had always had such a straight back, and now her spine was developing a curve. Gray streaked her thick hair, and the wrinkles on her face seemed deeper than he remembered from even a few weeks ago. His gaze fell to her hands, increasingly knobby with arthritis. She was a short, stocky woman whose skin was darker than his. Tony’s height had come from his father.
Mamá chattered about the girls and complained about how seldom she heard from Isabella. “It was foolish to let her go so far from home. She could be in all kinds of trouble, and we’d never know.”
He smiled. “Having sex, you mean?”
Mamá scowled at him. “Don’t even say that.”
“I didn’t like the idea either but, before she went, I had a talk with her about men and birth control. I know you don’t approve, but she’s smart. She won’t get pregnant and have to drop out of college.”
“But becoming a doctor will take so many years,” his mother worried. “She’ll never come home.”
“Summers.” Maybe. The college had hooked his baby sister up with a job at a medical clinic in Monroe, a town not that far from Seattle and near the size of Frenchman Lake, if you didn’t count the enormous state correctional facility there. Even Tony tried not to imagine an inmate escaping, taking Isabella hostage… No, he had enough to worry about here at home. And, for all Mamá’s complaints, his sister did send emails at least weekly and posted even more often on Facebook.
When they finished eating, his mother didn’t leap up to clear the table the way she normally would. Instead, she looked at him with eyes even darker than his own and said, “I think you have something to say.”
“I do,” he agreed. He’d spent the past hour mentally rehearsing what to say, not wanting to hurt her feelings.
Her mouth thinned, but she listened. Finally, she said, “This is about a woman.”
“No, Mamá.” Why bother saying Yes, I met a special woman, but I hurt her, and now she doesn’t want anything to do with me? His resentment predated Beth, anyway. “I love you all, but I need you to respect the long hours I work. How will I ever meet a woman if I’m always mowing my sister’s lawn or standing in her garage with my head under the hood of her car? I was with someone when you insisted I check on Eloisa. I understand why you were worried, but did you call anyone else in the family first? She might have talked to one of them five minutes before. Carlos wasn’t home, but Eddie and Diego probably were. Why is it always me?”
“Because you’re the big brother,” she said, as if it were obvious. “They trust you. Not everyone does what they promise. You do.”
“Thank you for saying that.”
“So you don’t want to help your sisters anymore.”
He shook his head, smiling. “That’s not what I said, Mamá, and you know it. I will always help when they need me. When you need me. But not when they can fix their own problems. Do you understand?”
He could tell she’d rather not but did. Tony left a half hour later, after a big hug, knowing she might believe she was trying but would fall back into the same habits if he let her. But he’d told her what he felt, so she couldn’t say she didn’t understand when he said no to requests that he would no longer let himself feel were demands. Change went two ways, after all.
It wasn’t yet dark when Tony drove to Beth’s, turning into the alley and parking in a spot marked for visitors. He didn’t take the one closest to her back door, in case she did come out. Here, she wouldn’t notice him, but he had a good line of sight to her unit. He’d see when she turned out her lights, see anyone approaching. And with his window rolled down, he had a chance of hearing the sound of breaking glass, or a scream.
* * *
WITHIN TWENTY-FOUR HOURS, Beth had doubted her decision a few hundred times.
She’d vowed to take the risk of a relationship with him, then opted out after the first speed bump. A giant one, sure, but she could have foreseen it. He had issues, she’d known that. And…he’d been right about her having allowed—or encouraged? Awful thought!—her sister and father to be dependent on her.
