Page 57 of Gravity

When her head drops and her shoulders fall, I lift her chin, needing to have her eyes on me. Disappointment mixed with lust holds my gaze. A part of me wants to walk away, I should walk away—not because I don’t want her, because, fuck, I do—but because I believe she deserves someone better. But then the other part of me doesn’t like the thought of her being with another, and jealousy ripples in my chest.

No, I can’t have that. It needs to be me.

“I will not have your first time be on a hard surface where anyone could walk in and find us. It will not be some quick fumble to release a need before we go about our day like it never happened. I want you, Nora—I’ve wanted you for so fucking long—but not like this.

She kisses me with a hunger that matches what I feel for her, wrapping her arms around my neck before I lift her off the kitchen island and head upstairs to her room, questioning how the hell I’m going to control myself when I’m so desperate to be inside her. Because it won’t be happening tonight.

Tonight, I will hold her in my arms and kiss her until she knows what she is worth.

Chapter Sixteen

Nora

I’ve wanted you for so fucking long.

His words have rattled around in my head for the last half an hour as he has bruised my lips with his in searing kisses, leaving me breathless and unraveled.

How have we by-passed this? How have we danced around this: me wanting him, him wanting me…

“You’ve gone quiet on me, Shortcake. You are either sleeping or overthinking. Which is it?”

I’m lying against Grayson’s chest, our legs entwined, our fingers slow dancing with each other as we watch them. The red-hot air that had been between us just moments ago has been replaced with a tranquility that’s just as arousing as he holds me. And although every nerve ending within me is on fire and the pulse between my legs aches like never before, I respect the fact he’s being a gentleman—not that I would have objected to anything that was to have taken place between us. I still won’t.

“I was both thinking and overthinking about different things.”

“What are you overthinking?”

I smile. He never likes it when I stress myself out over things, but I feel this is a reasonable thing to be anxious about: what’s to come of Dad and not knowing what to do.

“I was thinking about Pop, but that’s led to me panicking a little.”

“Tell me,” he whispers, now playing with my hair.

“How would I know what to do should it happen again? Will it be the same or worse? Will he be the same as he was, and if so, do we carry on as normal or does he need to rest more now? I don’t want to push him, Grayson, but at the same time, I don’t want him to feel I’ve cast him aside because I’m worried about making him sicker. What do I do?” It’s all things that seem so small but that could have an impact all the same.

He's silent a moment as I trail my fingers over the fabric of his T-shirt, wanting to remove it so I can feel his skin on mine.

“You change nothing. Be there for him like you have been. You do the things you came home to do. You treat him no differently to the way you already have, and you make sure the smile on his face is there just as much as it is on yours. You do all of that and you can’t go wrong. But treating him differently, making him aware that he’s got something else to contend with each day and just holding back from him because you think he needs it will only make things worse. For you and him. He’ll resent you for it, and eventually, you’ll hate yourself for not keeping things like they were.”

My heart feels heavy. Everything he’s just said makes sense, but I can’t help think he is talking of himself and his mom as much as me and Dad. I don’t know much, but I know from conversations at home that when Sandie drank more, Grayson had become more frustrated with her taking to hiding his troubles by spending more time at Hot Tuna.

“Promise me you’ll do that?” he murmurs, desperation in his voice.

“I promise.”

“You won’t be on your own, Nora. You have me, your mom, and Asher. We’ll all be here and in this together. Just remember that.”

“Okay.”

He kisses the top of my head and we fall into a comfortable silence, my heart still aching for the man I rest against and everything he’s been through yet still doesn’t speak of.

“What were you thinking?”

I frown. “What?”

“You said you were thinking as well as overthinking. We’ve covered the over part, now what were you thinking?”

I smile, snuggling into him. “I was thinking how different the day started to how it’s ended. Not so many hours ago I was a wreck, and now I’m here with you and more relaxed than I’ve been in so long.”