Page 24 of Addiction

The one that I’m too afraid to voice.

The one that made me pick up the goddamn bottle to begin with.

CHAPTER SIX

Wade

My heart rate picks up speed, battering against my rib cage as a zing of electricity races down my spine. Asher Nelson is just as devastatingly beautiful in the flesh as he is in my forbidden dreams. His short dark hair and the scruff that decorates his solid jawline are the perfect combination against his dark, mysterious eyes—ones that carry so many hidden secrets. His body is to die for: hard, cut and dripping in strength.

The only downside to the Greek God of a man standing across from me is the fact he can be an asshole. He has the reputation of being both the respectful SEAL as well as the local bad boy. He’s been labelled a train wreck, an imposter, an unworthy drunk who deserves nothing but the cold walls of the dark cell he’s not long walked free from, yet none of that has me turning my head to avoid him.

My first encounter with him was a little under two years ago and considering I had been caring for his father regarding his physical therapy, the appreciation from Asher had come in the form of hard stares and grunts of acknowledgement. He’d screamed intimidation, welcomed disagreements, and I’d never seen him without a beer—or two—in his hand.

But despite the grizzly side to this man who is so damn intriguing, there is a part of me that wants to know more. I need to know the man beneath the dark shadows and complications. And now, all this time later, and having not seen him in a year, nothing for me has changed. All those thoughts and feelings that had swamped me back then are still very much at the surface.

Leaning against the wall with his hands in his pockets, his eyes don't have any element of light as he holds my gaze. His jaw is locked, his stance unyielding. I’ve seen this man at his lowest. I’ve seen him on his knees with desperation and now he’s back, I’m determined to get into the mind of the man that captivates my thoughts so greatly.

“Wade, darling. It’s so good to have you back home.” Fiona beams, wrapping her arms around me in a tight embrace.

My relationships with patients and their families have always been professional. I love my job and have never once jeopardized it for anyone. But there had been something about working with the Nelsons that had me letting my guard down. I had remained professional at all costs, but somewhere along the way, they became more like family to me than my own.

Pete’s death has affected everyone a great deal and I too feel the loss of him far more than I have with any other patient I’ve worked with. I’d looked up to him. He had been an inspiration, funny, lovable, and had cared for his family regardless of their faults and for that, I’d admired him.

My father has never done that.

Any faults his children have are forbidden because we’ve had a reputation to live up to. If any one of us so much as taints the family name, there are consequences. And Jesus don’t I know that because I had become their problem child.

But with the Nelson’s, I can be myself. I’ve never once felt judged, and at times, the conversations I’d had with Pete became my favorite part of the week. I’d confided in him when he’d confided in me. I’d told him my fears when he’d told me his. I’d told him my thoughts and he’d told me his, and so forth. On many occasions, it had been the only way I could get him to comply with the therapy because even though he had been a great man, he had also been so goddamn stubborn. I guess that’s where Asher gets his attitude from.

I pull back, gripping Asher’s mom on the shoulders. “It’s good to be home.”

“I wasn’t sure when you’d be back. Sorry for the short notice invitation.”

“Fiona, nothing is ever short notice when it comes to you guys.”

I glance over her shoulder, locking eyes with Asher once more before he slowly patrols around the kitchen like a lion surveying his lands. I can see the tension in his shoulders even with the distance between us, and I can’t work out if his body language is because everyone is darting questions at him or because of me.

“So how was Puerto Rico? Nora tells me that we need a vacation there.”

“Oh, man. It was both colorful and incredible. It was great to get away for a few days.” I pause. “And you do need a vacation there.”

“Maybe one day I’ll head in that direction.”

“I’ll take you. I’d love to go again.”

She laughs, placing her hand on my arm. “Well, I’ll look forward to that. Does Asher know you’re here? He’ll be pleased to see you.” She turns her head to the side in search of her son.

Asher and I are neither friends nor enemies. In the few weeks that he had been around before he went to California, he’d done his best to avoid contact with me while I worked with his dad. The times we were around each other, we’d held short but civil conversations. Even then, though, I’d got the feeling that they were one-sided. My side.

Shouting above the voices, Fiona tells Asher to come and say hi, and he reluctantly heads our way.

“I’m so glad to have my boy home.” She beams, holding her hand over her heart. Despite Asher’s troubles and the wrongs that have been brought upon him, there is so much love and support for him too, something that I’m unsure he is aware of.

“Asher, Wade is here.”

“I can see that, Mom.” He smiles at her before looking at me. “Wade. Good to see you.”

The second he is close, his spicy fragrance consumes me, and my hand automatically reaches out in acknowledgment.