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“I do not want to get hurt,” she reiterated to me.
“Me either,” I whispered.Chapter EightI was soldering a chain onto Whitney’s umbrella—the final touch—while Jonah watched with Whitney sleeping in his arms. It was just the three of us. The class had ended over an hour ago and our friends conveniently left us by ourselves. I stared at the umbrella, perplexed by the little girl who chose bold purple, red, and blue because they were power colors. When I was five, I chose colors because I found them pretty. I never once thought about the meaning behind them.
“You were good with Whitney tonight. Thank you. I never thought she would break the glass apart after you scored it,” Jonah interrupted my thoughts.
It had taken some serious coaxing. I had to show her how to break the glass five times and answer all her questions about the exact properties of glass, and she insisted on googling injuries sustained by stained glass artists. I had to say how impressed I was by how fast she could type into her dad’s phone. After her research, she requested goggles and gloves before she would even try. I still couldn’t get her to try soldering, even with gloves and my assistance. Maybe next time. Wait. Would there be a next time?
“Can I ask you a question?” I asked Jonah.
“Anything,” he responded.
I placed my solder iron back in its stand and took a moment to stare at the sleeping beauty in his arms. “How do you make a kid like her?”
Jonah shifted her in his arms.
“I don’t mean that as an insult, by the way. I’m impressed. Maybe a little freaked out.”
Jonah gave me an appreciative smile while gently swiping Whitney’s bangs. “Sometimes it concerns me too,” he admitted. “She was born naturally intelligent, but Eliza and I didn’t do her any favors by focusing so much on it. I wish we had let her be a kid. I hate that she’s two grades above her age, and according to every standardized test she’s leaps and bounds above that, at least in some respects. Emotionally she’s still a little girl, even if she doesn’t believe it.”
“She must keep you on your toes.” I settled onto the nearby stool. I had a feeling Jonah wasn’t going anywhere.
“Toes and knees, praying that I’m not too late.”
I tilted my head. “Too late for what?”
“To undo my mistakes. I wish I would have been more vocal about my concerns earlier on.”
“Does your ex-wife,” I hesitated to ask, “feel differently than you?”
“Eliza is a good person,” he paused, “but she sees life as a series of goals to be completed and milestones to reach. She fears wasted potential like you fear me.”
Ah. He found a way to bring it back to us. I clasped my hands together and wrung them fiercely.
“I’m sorry, Ariana. That came out callously.”
“I don’t think you know how to be callous. And you’re right. Which makes me wonder what you’re doing here.”
He looked between Whitney and me. “At the beginning of the year, Eliza confessed that she felt like marrying me was a mistake.”
Whoa. That was harsh. But not unexpected. Isn’t that what I had feared for Jonah and me all along? But how could anyone think Jonah was a mistake? You know, except for me. But I wasn’t even sure I believed it. Therein was my dilemma. “I’m sorry, Jonah.” Truly, I was.
Jonah shrugged. “It was a long time coming. I suppose you would say I should have expected it.”
I pushed around some chain scraps on the table. “Honestly, I thought if anyone could beat the odds, it would be you.”
“I still plan on beating them.”
My head popped up.
Jonah’s set facial features said he was issuing me a challenge.
I was more than certain I knew what he meant, but it had been nine years. Nine years since I had broken both our hearts. I cleared my throat. “How do you plan on doing that?”
He leaned forward. “When I left Pine Falls, I meant to do so with no regrets, and at the time I thought I had, even though things between us didn’t turn out how I hoped.”
The heat rose to my cheeks.
“But after Eliza left me, I realized something. You are my person. You made me who I am, and I regretted not fighting for you.”
“Jonah.” I pled with my tone for him to stop talking like that. He had no idea the misery and ecstasy he was causing within my heart. I had regrets too, but I was in no state of mind to entertain what it sounded like he was offering me.
“Ariana, I know what you’re going to say. You think it wouldn’t have mattered, but I don’t believe it. You have no idea what it’s like for someone to fight for you. Your mother sure as hell didn’t, and as much as I love your grandparents, they didn’t either. Don’t even get me going on your non-existent, cowardly father. You need someone to fight for you. That person is me, so get ready.”
