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I just wish I would have told him how much I love him before I forced him to leave.
Chapter Sixteen
Mark
What the fuck just happened? One minute we’re laughing and showing off Daisy’s cuteness, and the next, she’s telling me to leave. Telling me I can’t see either of them anymore.
“Did that just happen?” I ask, staring after her as she races down the hall and disappears into the bathroom.
I feel Ridge’s hand land on my shoulder in silent support. “She’s scared,” Kendall defends.
“Of what? Of me?” I blanch at her words.
“Yes, but not the way you’re thinking. She’s afraid of needing you.”
“I want her to need me.”
Kendall’s eyes soften. “I know you do, but she’s been through a lot these past few months. She lost her parents at the hands of her sister, and now here she is again, in this situation because of her sister. She thinks she’s bringing you down with her. She’s afraid that if she leans on you too much, that when you walk away, it’ll break her. Not just break her heart, Mark. It will break her. She won’t come back from that and she has to stay strong for that little girl in there.”
“Did she tell you that?” I ask.
“She didn’t have to. She’s my best friend.”
“I love her. I’m not leaving her.”
Kendall nods. “I know that too. She needs time to process what she just did. She’s scared. She’s going to be a mom to a baby who was born to a drug-addicted mother. That’s a huge undertaking. We’re her only support system. While you and I know that’s enough, that we are here for whatever she needs, she sees it differently. She sees it as her responsibility and that she has herself to rely on.”
“She has me.” I slam my hand against my chest, trying like hell to keep my voice calm, remembering where I am.
“I’m glad to hear that.”
“What?” I ask, confused. I look over at Ridge. “Are the women in our lives losing their damn minds?” Ridge chuckles.
“She’s going to realize what she did was wrong. She’s going to realize that she made a mistake. I’m glad to hear that you’re going to fight for her.”
“How do I do that, Kendall? How do I fight for them when she’s pushing me away? She said I couldn’t see Daisy. She needs me. The skin-to-skin thing, that helps her and I know she knows my voice,” I say, trying to control my emotions.
Kendall steps forward and wraps her arms around me. “I love how you love her,” she whispers.
“I can’t leave them here,” I confess, wrapping my arms around her.
“Then don’t,” Ridge speaks up.
“She said she was taking me off the list. I can’t see Daisy, and she won’t see me.”
“She was saying whatever she needed to push you away.”
“So, what do I do?”
“Get a room,” Ridge says. “You stay here close by.”
“Hey.” Amelia approaches.
“How is she?”
“Broken.”
I nod.
“She’s not thinking clearly, and when she finally does, she’s going to have some regrets. Namely you,” Amelia says pointedly.
“Help me.” My voice is pleading.
“You’re staying?” she asks. I’m sure she overheard our conversation.
“Yeah, I’m going to get a room nearby.”
“Okay, I’ll have her do the same. Make sure you’re in separate hotels.”
“And?” I ask, hope bubbling inside.
“And I’ll convince her to let us take shifts. She knows she’s not keeping me from anything, so when she goes to the room to sleep, I’ll call you.”
“Will they let me see her?”
“I’m sure they will. If she does take you off the list, use your Mark Adams charm.”
“You mean his brooding ‘give me my way’ charm?” Ridge jokes.
I crack a smile. Fucker. He’s no more sunshine and roses than I am unless it’s his wife and kids.
“Okay. So, I come here to see Daisy when Dawn’s not around? The staff is going to be suspicious.”
“So you tell them the truth.”
“And they kick me out,” I counter.
Amelia shrugs. “They’ve seen you with the baby, and with Dawn. Explain her losses, and they’re already aware of the situation with the baby’s mom. I think you’re good.”
“So what? I just visit the baby and never see Dawn? I hate this idea.”
“It’s the best I’ve got. She’s going to need you. She’s going to crack and you’re going to be close by when that happens.”
“How do you know?” I ask.
A haunted look comes over her. “Let’s just say I had a friend, in college, that had some medical issues. She did something similar. She regretted it.”
“Mara?” Kendall inquires.
“No, but that girl, she’s been through her fair share of heartbreak.”
“What do you have to lose?” Ridge asks. “You don’t want to leave, and you know the baby is responding to you. You hang out, visit when you can, and be ready.”
“And if she never changes her mind?” I ask. That’s the issue here. We’re going on the assumption that she regrets pushing me away. And no matter how much I want to believe that, my heart is also cracked wide open and bleeding from her words. I’m not convinced she’s going to change her mind.
“Then you know you’ve done all that you can,” Kendall says. “I’ve known her since our freshman year of college. She’s always been independent. Hell, she moved to Jackson with me, away from her family. Sure, she wanted to get away from the drama that was her sister, and now she has to live with that. She has to live with the fact that she left and wasn’t here.” She swallows hard. “She loves you, Marcus. I promise you that. She’s just been through hell and back and she’s trying to brace herself for the impact of this latest fall.”
“Come on. We’ll get you a room, and get you settled in,” Ridge tells me. “Amelia, we’re going to grab you and Dawn a room as well. Kendall will text you the details.”
“I’ll handle it,” Amelia assures me.
“Thank you.” I give her a hug. “Take care of them for me,” I whisper, before letting her go. Then I turn and walk out of the hospital. I thought the day I walked back out these doors, Dawn and Daisy would be with me.
Lying on this bed in my hotel room feels wrong. The bed’s too soft, and the room’s too quiet. I’ve grown accustomed to the chairs in the hospital waiting room, and the constant hustle and bustle of the medical staff and visitors. I miss her. I miss both of them.
Amelia texted me about an hour ago and said that she finally convinced Dawn to go to the room and get a good night’s sleep. She’s taking the night shift with Daisy. So, here I am, waiting for the message that tells me I can come back to the hospital. I have one more hurdle to jump, and that’s convincing the staff not to tell Dawn about my visits and to still let me snuggle Daisy.
Needing a distraction, I pick up my phone and dial my mom. “Hey, honey, is everything okay?” she asks immediately.
“No.”
“Marcus, what’s going on?” Her voice is soft and filled with concern.
“It’s been a week,” I say, and then proceed to fill her in on everything that’s happened up to this point.
“Wow. Your dad said he texted you about borrowing some tool and that you were in Mason with Dawn’s new niece. We had no idea.”
“I’m sorry. I should have called and explained, but it’s been a rough few days.”
“I get that, but that doesn’t explain the sadness I hear in your voice. You said the baby, Daisy, that she’s doing well? I love that name,” she says.
“She is. She’s gaining weight and her vitals are strong. And as far as her name…” I explain to her how I was searching for a cute name to call her, and when I saw Daisy and considered the meaning, doubled with the fact that it was my mom’s favorite, I started calling her that. “Then Dawn, she loved the name. It goes with the D theme that her parents used for her and her sister. I guess that’s what she’s naming her. I don’t know about her middle name. I assume her last name will be Miller. Destiny wasn’t married, at least not that we’re aware of. She was checked into the hospital as Miller.”
“It’s a beautiful name,” she says, and I can hear the smile in her voice.
“Am I messing up here, Mom? Should I just come home?” I can’t help but feel as though I’m betraying Dawn.
“Only you can decide that.”
“Tell me from a woman’s perspective.”
“Well, it sounds to me as if Dawn is letting her head rule her heart. She’s been through so much, and I can’t blame her for not thinking clearly.”
“Would you be pi— ticked off when you found out?”
She’s quiet and I’m starting to worry what her answer will be. “Honestly, I can’t say. I can tell you that she knows you and knows the kind of man you are. You’re not trying to hurt her or the baby. I think she’ll see that.”
“I hope so.”
“Hey, why don’t Dad and I come up there tomorrow? We’ll grab lunch and visit for a while.”
“Yeah, that sounds great, Mom. I’ll text you my hotel info.”
