Page 66 of When She Belongs


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For now, I have the promise of more kisses, and I will take it.41JERROKThe noodles are a little soggy after boiling for so long, but I do not complain. Sophie made a meal for me, and it is the best-tasting thing I have ever had.

She sits across from me, smiling as she eats dainty bites, and I think about the shower. How she came in after me and insisted on apologizing. My heart squeezes when I think about her shy confessions, and I vow I will do better to talk to her, too. My normal response is to shut down, to wound with words, to attack before I am hurt myself, but Sophie doesn't deserve this. She is just trying to figure out her way through a muddle of confusing feelings.

I know what that is like.

Sleipnir paces next to her legs, sliding his sinuous body around her over and over again and watching her eat with a plaintive expression. I lower my bowl and wipe at my face with my sleeve, then gesture at the carinoux. "He seems hungry."

"He is." Her cheeks redden. "I thought I'd wait to feed him until after dinner, so you and I can have some time alone." She smiles at me and then hastily adds, "To talk, of course."

"Of course." I don't point out that the carinoux has no problems with us talking. That we're talking right now. But I'm also not stupid. If she has some sort of plan for after dinner, I want to see what it is.

We finish our meals, and I do my best not to make as much noise when I eat. Occasionally, I smack or slurp a bit too loudly and she looks up at me, which makes me think perhaps my manners aren't the best. I've always eaten quickly, because growing up, I was always afraid that another station rat would see me eating and try to steal my food. When I was in the military, ration bars were in ready supply…until they weren't. When we were under siege on Thresh III, food became scarce, and you learned to choke down anything you could chew on, just to survive. Now that I'm here on my station, alone, there's been no point to eating politely.

But for Sophie, I'm willing to try.

Once the dishes are put into the small cleanser unit, Sophie feeds the carinoux. We both watch in silence as he takes the slab of raw meat and pads away with it, off to hide in a corner and eat privately. When he's gone, I look over at her, and she gestures at the door. "Want to go sit in the other room?"

"I…guess?" Sitting one place is as good as another, isn't it?

She takes my hand, though, and leads me away. I follow after her, fascinated at her touch. She just reached out and took my hand like it was nothing. No one ever does that. Sophie touches me like I'm hers. We head into the room that she's been working on clearing out, and there's a long bench along the wall that I've never particularly paid attention to. "I'm going to make you some pillows to make this softer," she tells me. "More inviting to sit on." And she curls up on one end of the bench and pats the seat next to her, indicating I should join her.

I like that she's thinking about ways to improve my home. It's almost as if she wants to stay, and I'm filled with utter yearning at the thought. Having Sophie at my side…forever? That'd be a dream. I sit down next to her, feeling awkward, and look around. There's still crates and crates of random things stacked into a corner, but for the most part, the room's cleared out. I notice the empty shelves in the back of the room, the perfect size for Sophie's books, and then I remember the other human things that were in a container. I'd brought the crate back in here after pulling the books out, just to keep my workstation clear.

I jump to my feet, just as she reaches for me.

"Wait," she calls. "Where are you going?"

"I have more human things. I wanted to give them to you."

"Human things?" She sounds interested. "What sorts of human things?"

I shrug, pulling the crate out from the jumble and peeking under the lid to make sure it's the right one. When I'm satisfied, I heft it into my arms and move back to the bench. "Maybe you can tell me what they are."

Sophie's expression is eager as she sits forward. I hesitantly sit back down next to her, not wanting to crowd her if she needs space, but she puts her hand on my knee before leaning over to take off the lid, and just that small touch fills me with joy. She sets the lid aside and pulls the first thing out, wearing a puzzled expression.

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