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I Can't Even Think Straight

Page 102

by Dean Atta

when she couldn’t get hold of Mum.

Apparently, Mr. Ndour’s fiction

is more convincing than reality.

Mr. Ndour, the snake, phoned Ms. Sarpong

when I was walking to her office.

Ms. Sarpong wouldn’t listen to me.

Ms. Sarpong had said I could talk

to her “about anything.”

But “anything” clearly didn’t include

one of her teachers having a vendetta

against me and The Boys.

Ms. Sarpong said I had “an attitude,”

which maybe I do and maybe I did in that moment.

She cut me off with a raised hand.

“Okay, Malachi, that’s enough,” said Ms. Sarpong.

“You need to calm down now.”

Granny shows no signs of calming down,

now or anytime soon.

I know Granny feels under pressure

because the school contacted her.

I know Granny feels afraid

I’ll become another troublesome grandson.

I stay silent and still at the kitchen table.

I slump in my seat as Granny continues to shout.

I dissociate.

I leave Granny and my body behind.

I sink underwater,

and I can’t hear Granny clearly anymore,

besides the occasional swear word

in explicit and explosive plosive patois,