Page 43 of Hockey Player Seeking Fan

“Really, Tyler? I'm going to go. That's ridiculous.”

He laughs. “But I just wanted to say that I think last night was fun, and I enjoyed hanging out with you. And actually, I enjoyed kissing you.”

“Okay?”

“And if you wanted to make an amendment to the bet…”

“Why would I make an amendment? I'm still going to win. Just because I had one kiss with you doesn’t mean my soulmate is not out there. In fact…” I open the app on my phone and go through my messages. “I have some guys who want to go out tonight.” I click on one randomly. “This guy says he wants to go dancing. And you know what? I feel like going dancing tonight. So I think I'm going to go.”

“You're really into this dating thing, aren't you?”

“Well, I want to win the bet, and I want to prove to you that life is about more than just making out with random men in bars. It's about having a meaningful relationship. It’s about kissing someone when you know your soul and your?—”

I hear Tyler laughing.

“Why are you laughing, Tyler?”

“Because you know what? Sometimes life is just about fucking and kissing and doing whatever you want to do and not having it mean anything. Sometimes life is for the living, Erica.It's for the living. And it doesn't mean that it means anything. It might just mean something for that moment, for that day. And that doesn't make it good or bad. It just means that you are enjoying every single thing you do.”

“Okay, Einstein. Do you enjoy everything you do every single day?”

“Good question. Maybe, maybe not. But I will tell you that I don't stop myself from doing things I want to do.”

“So you're doing everything that you really want to do?” I ask. “This is your dream? You're living your dream?”

“Well, I'm living part of my dream,” he says thoughtfully.

“So what part of the dream are you not living?” I ask. There’s silence on the line for a few moments. I think he's going to open up to me. I think he's going to tell me that he secretly wishes to meet the love of his life and get married. Or maybe he’ll tell me about some high school or college girl who broke his heart and made him put up a shield. I wait for him to tell me that he, too, wants to be in love.

But of course, that's not what he says.

“I want to paint you.”

“What?” I don’t say it because I'm in disbelief that he wants to paint; I say it because I'm slightly disappointed. Because part of me thought maybe we were on the same page and he was just in denial. But of course, once again, I’ve proven to myself that I’m living in a land far, far away.

“I've always loved to paint. But I went into hockey, and that's taken up a lot of my time. My love for the arts has kind of drifted away, and I haven't been able to do that as much. And maybe I do need to take my own advice. Maybe I need to just allow myself to go there, even if it's not my day job.”

“Yeah, you should. You really should, Tyler.

“Anyway, I think Sabrina has made me some breakfast, and I'm going to go and eat and… well, I'm going to have fun tonightand go dancing. And maybe I will just see where the night takes me.”

“Okay,” he says. “Well, I hope you enjoy your evening.”

“Thanks. You, too. I hope you have a lot of fun doing whatever you're going to do.”

“I mean, I don't think it will be as fun as last night,” he says. “You’ve got some luscious lips there, Erica.”

I press my lips together, my heart pounding.

“Well, thank you.”

“You're not going to say ‘same to you’?”

“No.”

“So you don't believe in giving compliments?”

“No,” I say, slightly annoyed and embarrassed that we're still talking about this—and actually quite turned on.