Page 64 of Hockey Player Seeking Fan

And as much as I’m enjoying him, enjoying this, I don’t know if he feels the same way.

I don’t know if I’m just sex to him.

And my heart feels tight.

Because I think I’m already falling for him.

And now, I finally understand what love really means.

And I realize that just because I love him… doesn’t mean he loves me back.

Chapter Eighteen

Tyler

I feel like absolute shit.

It's been a week since I slept with Erica, and I haven't seen her since I woke up the morning after we made love. She hadn't been there, and she hasn't answered any of my calls. I don't even know what to say. What to do.

I'd been fucking shocked when I realized she was a virgin, though. I don't know why it surprised me. It really should have made sense. I should have figured it out before that moment. She was so innocent, so sweet, so desperately looking for true love that it made sense she hadn't slept with anyone before. But she'd given herself to me—wanting and lovingly. Fuck. I’m growing hard just thinking about it.

I don’t even want to think about what she is doing or thinking.

I try calling her again, but she doesn't answer. I've tried calling her twenty-two times. I sent her eleven text messages. I don’t want to seem like a psycho and realize that I need to get out of this funk.

Maybe I hadn’t been good. Maybe she didn’t like me. Maybe—just maybe—she realized that she didn’t want to be with a man like me. That’s why she hasn’t called me back.

God, I wish she’d give me an opportunity to tell her. To show her just how much better I could be.

My phone rings, and I perk up, excitedly hoping it’s her. But it’s not.

It’s an old friend of mine that I’d gone on a couple of dates with back in the day.

“Hey, what’s going on, Jennifer?” I say as I answer the phone. I don’t really want to talk to her, but I need to distract myself from thinking about Erica.

“Yo, Tyler. What’s good?”

“Not much. Just getting ready for the big game coming up.”

“Yeah. Good luck with that. So, I have a question for you.”

“Yeah? What’s that?”

“What are you up to tonight?”

“I am not looking for anything right now.” I say immediately.

“Tyler, you know I think you’re a great guy, but?—”

“I didn’t mean to offend you. Our time together was fun.”

“No, it’s not for me, dude. I like girls now.”

“Oh. You do?” I had not expected that. At all.

“Yeah, I do. I’ve been dating a woman for the last six months.”

“Oh, my bad.” I chuckle. “I didn’t see that one coming.”