AllFreeNovel
Share Us
He caught sight of a pile of music books sitting in a corner of the room with the same name on the top one. BACH. He threw himself at the pile and started to scrabble through it. Book after book--J. S. BACH. Cello sonatas. Brandenburg Concertos. A Mass in B Minor.
He looked up at her in blank incomprehension.
"I've never seen any of this before," he said.
"Richard my darling," she said, putting her hand to his cheek, "what on earth's the matter? It's just Bach sheet music."
"But don't you understand?" he said, shaking a handful of the stuff. "I've never, ever seen any of this before!"
"Well," she said with mock gravity, "perhaps if you didn't spend all your time playing with computer music..."
He looked at her with wild surprise, then slowly he sat back against the wall and began to laugh hysterically.
On Monday afternoon Richard phoned Reg.
"Reg!" he said. "Your phone is working. Congratulations."
"Oh yes, my dear fellow," said Reg, "how delightful to hear from you. Yes. A very capable young man arrived and fixed the phone a little earlier. I don't think it will go wrong again now. Good news, don't you think?"
"Very good. You got back safely then."
"Oh yes, thank you. Oh, we had high excitement here when we returned from dropping you off. Remember the horse? Well he turned up again with his owner. They'd had some unfortunate encounter with the constabulary and wished to be taken home. Just as well. Dangerous sort of chap to have on the loose I think. So. How are you then?
"Reg... The music--"
"Ah, yes, I thought you'd be pleased. Took a bit of work, I can tell you. I saved only the tiniest tiniest scrap, of course, but even so I cheated. It was rather more than one man could actually do in a lifetime, but I don't suppose anybody will look at that too seriously."
"Reg, can't we get some more of it?"
"Well, no. The ship has gone, and besides--"
"We could go back in time--"
"No, well, I told you. They've fixed the phone so it won't go wrong again."
"So?"
"Well, the time machine won't work now. Burnt out. Dead as a dodo. I think that's it I'm afraid. Probably just as well, though, don't you think?"
On Monday, Mrs Sauskind phoned Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency to complain about her bill.
"I don't understand what all this is about," she said, "it's complete nonsense. What's the meaning of it?"
"My dear Mrs Sauskind," he said, "I can hardly tell you how much I have been looking forward to having this exact same conversation with you yet again. Where shall we begin
today? Which particular item is it that you would like to discuss?"
"None of them, thank you very much, Mr Gently. I do not know who you are or why you should think my cat is missing. Dear Roderick passed away in my arms two years ago and I have not wished to replace him."
"Ah, well Mrs Sauskind," said Dirk, "what you probably fail to appreciate is that it is as a direct result of my efforts that--If I might explain about the interconnectedness of all..." He stopped. It was pointless. He slowly dropped the telephone back on its cradle.
"Miss Pearce!" he called out, "Kindly send out a revised bill would you to our dear Mrs Sauskind. The new bill reads 'To: saving human race from total extinction--no charge.'"
He put on his hat and left for the day.
. . . to be continued
