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“I had to use the restroom,” I said, though now when I thought about it, perhaps I did use the stalls to change. “It’s a habit.”
Karen shrugged and stood up. She was taller than me, and with her lean, athletic body, I thought she’d join a sports team, but she told me she was too busy for that sort of thing. She nudged at my shoulder. “Let’s go before we’re late.”
At her touch, I clammed up. I don’t know what came over me. I hurried, as though doing as she told so we weren’t tardy. In reality, I just wanted to keep a distance from her for some reason. I wasn’t sure what it was, but I noticed it as the weeks into school progressed. While we did talk, we never became close. I often ran out of things to say and we spent time staring at other students in class and not talking at all. I had a rough time with making friends, but it was better with Karen who was sweet and friendly; this was about as close I’d ever gotten to a friendship with a girl.
I tried to relax with her, but I clammed up every time. I internally sighed, wishing I could get over this shyness. I just needed to stop thinking about it so much.
I followed Karen into the gym and to our spots on the floor to wait with everyone else. The gym at Ashley Waters High School felt surreal with the onslaught of rain tapping at the wide windows. The clouds were so dark, it felt like night even though it was still around two in the afternoon.
I scanned the gym for Nathan and Gabriel. They were sitting and talking while other boys found their designated spots, and waited for instructions from the gym coaches. They wore matching black sport shorts and T-shirts that were the guys’ uniform.
Gabriel’s gym T-shirt looked a little snug against his long, taut body and his angular collarbone stood out against his broad shoulders. The three black rings that aligned along the crest of his right ear contrasted with the red crystal studs, one in each lobe. His angled face turned to me, catching me staring at him. He waved and then ran his fingers through the blond front locks in his chin-length hair, mixing it with the russet brown in the back as if trying to make sure his hair was in place. The tips of his hair were starting to hang below his ears. He didn’t need to fix anything. The punk style seemed perfect for him.
The movement of his hand drew Nathan’s attention and he waved, too. His reddish hair looked a little scraggly and stuck up in the back. He’d been complaining about it getting too long and wanted Gabriel to cut it for him. The locks reached around his ears and sometimes hung in front of his deep blue eyes. The sight was often stunning. And since it capped his statuesque figure, with his broad shoulders and acutely defined muscles, my breath caught often just looking at him.
But then all of the Academy boys looked good to me.
I yawned. I’d been tired all day. I would have been happy if we ended up being excused from any kind of activity for gym class. I’d put up a brave face for the guys today, but I was exhausted.
I didn’t really have a reason for being tired. I’d slept the night before. I’d been busy with the guys, of course, but lately it had been harder to keep up with them. I thought maybe I just wasn’t used to the constant Academy activities, plus school, plus dealing with my parents being gone. I felt like before I met the boys, I’d been in a holding pattern and now I was flying at breakneck speed and still wasn’t even close to catching up with them.
I did my best. I just wanted a little break. Like not having to do any exercise today.
But Coach French was unrelenting. I saw it in her eyes as she marched across the basketball court with her whistle in her hand. She blew sharply into it, even though the rest of the girls had already started to get up in preparation. “On your feet,” she said.
I summoned up my energy, hoping I’d find additional reserves after I started moving. Maybe that was my problem. I’d been sitting still all day because I was so tired. At lunch, I was half leaning against North just trying to stay awake. Maybe if I got up and got moving, I’d find I’d just needed a jump start.
I stood with the others, ready to get exercising over with.
Coach French bellowed her commands. “Start stretching.”
I swayed back and forth, bending my arms and shoulders and my back. I followed the others in the usual routine.
The others lifted their arms over their heads, I lifted mine.
The others stretched down to touch their left toe, I did the same.
That was when I felt the first pang of something surging through my head, like I was being swallowed up by molasses.
When the others straightened up and got ready to bend toward the right toe, I was right there with them.
At first.
After that point, everything went dark and murky like the overhead clouds.
???
I woke up to Nathan’s voice calling my name. I felt like I was in a deep, thick sleep. I wanted to push him off of me, because I was sure he was just telling me I was in another nightmare and had woke him up, and I didn’t want to wake up. I was too tired and too out of it.
But he was insistent.
“Sang,” he said, though his voice sounded distant to me. “Sweetie, wake up.”
“What’s wrong with her?” Karen asked.
It was Karen’s voice that roused me further, forcing me to wake up. What was she doing here? Something was wrong with me? What now?
My vision was splotchy at first, revealing Nathan’s deep blue eyes and serious expression. He hadn’t shaved in a couple of days, although because of his deeper tan and the hair color, I didn’t usually see it until I was up close. His tight lips made me wondered if I was in trouble again. Did I sleep in?
My memory returned in stages. I was on the ground. I was at school. Why was I asleep at school? On the gym floor? Nathan and Gabriel hovered over me. Karen was nearby. Other students looked on from behind them.
“What happened?” I whispered. This seemed wrong to me. My eyelids were so heavy, and the wave of sleep that had taken over had been so strong, that this felt like a dream. Everything was out of sync.
“Boys,” Coach French shouted from behind them. “Get back to your class.”
“I’m taking her to the doctor,” Nathan said. He bent over and slid his arms under my back and thighs. He lifted me into the air, cuddling me to his strong body.
Coach French blew a whistle at him. “Stop. One of the girls will take her to the nurse. Put her down.”
“I can take her,” Karen offered.
“I’ve got her,” Nathan said. I sensed Gabriel running ahead, holding open the gym doors.
There was more talking, more shouting from coaches, but Gabriel and Nathan were out into the hallway and no one came after them.
“Nathan,” I said, though my voice felt small and thick. “I can walk.” I thought I could. My head felt a little fuzzy.
“Shush, Trouble,” Gabriel said. He walked alongside Nathan and reached for my face. His rough-skinned fingertips caressed against my forehead as if trying to ease away whatever had come over me. “You’ve been looking ragged for days now. I thought maybe you were on your period, but I guess you’re sick or something.?
??
My cheeks heated. “I’m fine, guys. I was just lightheaded and then tripped or something. We can go back.”
“She doesn’t feel hot. No fever,” Gabriel said, ignoring my protests. He dropped his hand.
“Text Dr. Green,” Nathan said. “Tell him we’ll meet him at his office.”
After a minute, Gabriel responded. “He said meet him in the nurse’s office. Where is that?”
I closed my eyes, feeling disoriented as Nathan carried me through the hallways. He clutched me to his body. My hand landed on his chest, and I felt the swell of muscle. For a split moment, I thought about Karen and how she’d touched me and I wondered what the difference was. From Karen, I cowered. From Nathan and the boys, I craved. I waved the thoughts off. My mind had a hard time staying on task. I blamed my tired state.
I didn’t open my eyes again until he stopped in front of an office door with a glass panel. Nurse’s Office was marked in black lettering along the bubbled surface. Gabriel held the door open, and Nathan angled me inside.
Dr. Green’s face swam into view the moment we got inside. His light green eyes had darkened with worry, but lit up when I faced him. Sandy-colored hair hung in front of his eyes and heart shaped face. “Hello there, gorgeous. Didn’t I just see you in class?” he asked, his voice soothing.
“Hi Dr. Green,” I said. I blinked heavily, trying to swallow back the dizzy feeling.
“She passed out,” Nathan said. “During warm up exercises.”
“I’m fine,” I said. “I don’t feel sick. Just a little lightheaded.”
Nathan planted me on a cot. I sat on it in the middle. I flinched at seeing Mr. Blackbourne standing off to the side, quiet but focused on me.
Mr. Blackbourne was perfection in a gray suit and red tie. His short brown hair was brushed away from his face and his lips were solidly pursed. His trim figure was leaning against the wall, his arms folded over his chest. Nothing in his face or steel-colored eyes behind those black-rimmed glasses revealed what he was thinking.
It made me embarrassed to be there in the first place. It was like showing him I couldn’t keep up. I wasn’t good enough for the Academy.
