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“I’m not letting go. Just let me run down there. It isn’t that far.”
“You can’t just walk naked with her,” Axel said, the command in his voice. “Giver her to me. Get a towel. I’ll take her.”
I sucked down a breath, pushing the glasses up on my head and wiping at my eyes. Axel was right.
There was a jumble of echoes coming from the locker room on the women’s side. Male voices. Plus a woman crying that they couldn’t go in. I wiped at my face, clearing my tears so I could see. Marc stepped back, pulling me into his body, holding on, and Axel moved in front of us, looking around, spotting the towels but then faced off with the hall from the locker room as the voices got closer. “Get her a towel,” Axel said.
Marc aimed to get it, but not before people started flowing in and he stopped to hide me behind Axel.
“Axel!” Brandon emerged from the locker room first, followed by Corey. Raven and Blake trailed behind them. They all stopped, spotting me, naked, wet and crying, clinging to Marc. Jaws dropped. Hands clenched.
“Get out of here,” Axel called to them all.
“No,” Brandon said, marching forward, the others following up behind him.
Blake circled around, coming up behind Marc while the rest of them split between Marc and I and Axel, separating Axel from us.
Brandon stepped up to Axel, face as red as I’d ever seen it. “I told you we’d take care of this.”
“Avery said she was hurt. That something was wrong,” Axel said, his voice deep. He spoke through bared teeth. “This isn’t the time. Let’s just get her out.”
“We’ll get her out, like we said we would. We’ve asked you nicely to ease up on her,” Brandon said. Raven was at his shoulder, standing firm, his arms crossed over his chest, creating a barrier.
“I told you, you don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“I know what I heard,” Brandon said.
I clung to Marc, afraid. They’d all come in. Avery must have heard me complaining about the cramps and told them.
“What the hell is going on here?” Marc said, his voice wavering. He stepped sideways, shifting me to get a better grip. He was strong, but he couldn’t hold me up forever.
A towel draped over Marc’s shoulders, then over me. Blake appeared in front of me, reaching. “Let’s get her out of here,” Blake said. “She doesn’t need to see this.”
Marc hesitated but then released me to Blake. He covered himself up with the towel and then helped Blake adjust the towel over me. Once I was covered, Marc pushed him toward the door. “You know the way?”
“Like the back of my hand,” Blake said, hurrying on. The boys were arguing amongst themselves. Corey tried to get in the middle. Marc followed us, until Brandon got really loud and then Raven started in, half in Russian, talking over Axel trying to tell them to back off.
I gasped, holding onto Blake, wanting to walk but I couldn’t. “I should...stay,” I said through sobs. This was so messed up.
“Take her,” Marc said. “Get her out. Take her to the doctor.”
“Already done,” Blake said.
Marc went back, yelling at the others to calm down, trying to help Corey in getting everyone to back off of each other.
I had no control now. Blake’s grasp was firm, I had no room to wiggle. All I could do was hold on to his shoulders as he wound his way through the ship with me wrapped in a towel.
My cramps were nothing compared to the ache inside me. My heart was shattered into a million pieces, and I cried the entire way, blinded by tears. The only thing I heard was Blake breathing heavily as he carried me. They were together now. They would all know. All the secrets I’d piled up around them, the feelings I had. If they chose now to compare notes, they’d know.
Marc might admit to what just happened. Raven might talk about that morning. Axel might say he kissed me and I’d kissed him back. Even Brandon might be ready to talk about all the things we’d done before.
I felt so stupid. How could I toy with their feelings? How could I be so selfish? After everything they’d done for me, pulling me out of the gutter, offering to help me to find work, to better myself, to help with Wil... and I couldn’t be honest with them about how I felt. So what if I was confused, attracted to each of them for their different qualities. Now I felt stupid keeping it a secret.
I’d assumed before that if I could just figure it out on my own, which one I liked better, that it would solve everything. I wanted to give them a flat out honest answer when I figured it out. I went too far though. If I’d told them my confusion right from the start...maybe they would have been hurt, but would they fight like this?
Blake said nothing the entire way. I wondered if I’d hurt him, too.
Maybe I’d die of these cramps, and I’d save everyone the trouble.
RECUPERATION
The hospital was more like a nurse’s office at school, only with more equipment, and a separate room for emergency procedures. I sat on a table, looking at bandages and gauze in secured jars on a counter. The nurse weighed me and then made Blake leave while I waited for the doctor. I don’t know how my weight was relevant to this, but she seemed to be going through a routine and writing down notes.
I covered myself in the towel from the spa until the nurse provided a gown. I tried to calm myself before the doctor came in to see me. The cramps had already gone, becoming just a dull soreness.
The doctor was an older Asian man. He checked my pulse, asked me questions about my period, and then offered me a pill, a muscle relaxer. He said it would make me sleepy. He said the cramps were probably due to stress, but if I developed other symptoms, that I should come back and see him.
“She should probably get some sleep,” he said to Blake once he came in to collect me.
“I’ll make sure she does,” he said, and shook the doctor’s hand.
By the time I was done, Blake had some clothes for me, items he’d bought in the shops, a brightly colored sundress, underwear and a pair of flip-flops. “Something simple to go back down to the rooms in,” he said. “I know it isn’t your style.”
I didn't know where my glasses had gone. I lost them back at the spa. After I got dressed and we left the office, I buried my face into Blake’s shoulder nearly the entire way down to the rooms. I couldn’t look at anyone. I thought for sure everyone on the ship knew what had happened, and they could see through to how I’d been naked and stupid and made a complete fool of myse
lf. I wasn’t crying anymore, but I was still a complete mess. There was no way I could face anyone now. Forget the mission. Forget everything. How could I help anyone else when I was a stupid girl who couldn’t control her feelings and was selfish to want to draw their attention?
Barely out of the gate on this mission, and I’d probably destroyed the team. What kind of leader was I?
Blake led me down to my room. I was surprised he brought me there, but then, I wasn’t sure where else to go, either. I was just glad that the boys weren’t there.
He had a key for the door. He opened the door for me and I kicked off the flip-flops and went right for the bed. It had been made up, the maids had been by or the boys had cleaned it so they wouldn’t go in here.
I pulled the blanket aside and got in under it, pulling it over myself. I dropped my head onto the pillow. My eyes were sticky, raw and cold, tapped dry of tears. My heart was hollow.
I could have buried myself into the mattress for breaking down in front of the boys. No doubt it flared a lot of the anger amongst them. You can’t just cry in front of boys. It makes them crazy. It’s the dirtiest of all girl tricks and I’d never dared to use it in my life. This one time I couldn’t help it, and they all came rushing in at the same time, my tears making it worse since they were already fighting.
Now even Marc had to be caught up in the fight. They hadn’t been by the hospital to check up on me. They weren’t here now. My darkest assumptions repeated themselves my head over and over: they hate you now, they know you’ve flirted with them all, they’re done, they don’t want to see you, and they don’t care how you are.
A sorry, exasperated sigh escaped my lips. “I hate my life,” I said.
Blake closed the door and locked it, then made sure the bathroom door was closed. He crawled over the covers and scooted up behind me. He put his arm under the pillow, and the other around my stomach, spooning into me. He kissed the back of my head. “I’m sorry, Kayli,” he said quietly.
