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“Yes, I’ve noticed that.”
She breathes deeply and exhales a long breath; a breath that is probably filled with years of frustration and regret. “Can you promise me something, honey? Because I know he can be as stubborn as a mule on Wednesday when it comes to talking about his father and you seem like the kind of girl who can get him to open up. But I need you to promise me you’ll keep an open mind when he opens his heart?”
I smile even though I feel uncomfortable with her request. I don’t know what she means by “when he opens his heart.” What kind of secret is Adam hiding?
Margaret and I finish up the potato salad and the coleslaw. As soon as I start piping the filling into the deviled eggs, the door bursts open and Adam flies past us toward the living room. The rage rolls off him in thunderous waves as he storms out of the kitchen.
I turn to Margaret and she quickly unties the strings on the back of my apron. “Go ahead, honey. I’ll finish this up.”
I pull the apron over my head and hand it to her then set off through the swinging door into the living room. I glimpse Adam’s feet racing up the stairs and I follow quickly behind him. When I reach Jamie’s bedroom, I find him sitting on the edge of the bed with his elbows resting on the tops of his thighs and his hands clutching his hair. He’s tapping his foot impatiently and I feel as if I’m edging closer to a ticking time bomb.
I step inside and close the bedroom door behind me. “Adam, are you okay?”
He shakes his head almost imperceptibly, but he doesn’t answer.
I slowly make my way across the fluffy white rug and take a seat next to him. “I know you probably think I won’t understand because I never knew my father—I hardly knew my mother—but I have a lot of regrets, and pain, eating away at me over the separation from my last foster mother. I have a lot of things I want to say to her, but sometimes I think I could live my whole life without saying those things. And sometimes I think the secrets will kill me.”
He lifts his head and looks at me. “My dad wants me to go to Hawaii to schmooze some government officials for a new project on the naval base.”
“What’s wrong with that? Hawaii is beautiful.”
“If we get the project, I’ll have to stay there for up to two months to handle the startup.”
“Oh.” I stare at the rug on the floor because I don’t want him to see the disappointment in my eyes any more than he can see it in the slump of my shoulders.
“I’ve been trying to quit for years, but my dad won’t let me.” He gently turns my face toward him and the anguish in his eyes makes my chest ache. “Claire, there’s something you need to know about me.”
I draw in a slow breath, wishing I were at home so I could meditate. Wishing I were anywhere but here where I am about to hear a secret that may tear us apart. His mother’s words repeat in my mind: Try to keep an open mind when he opens his heart.
“When I was seventeen, my friend Myles and I went to California for a surf competition. I had been competing since I was fourteen, but it was his first competition. He was so stoked because he placed eighth, which is really good for a first-timer. Anyway, to celebrate we decided to go fuck around at a beach in Laguna. It was one of the best looking beaches I’ve ever surfed at.” He closes his eyes as if he’s picturing it in his mind. “We found a spot that looked good for diving and we took turns doing cannonballs and belly flops. Then I had the brilliant idea of jumping off backwards.”
A chill sprouts across my arms as I realize where this is going.
“He got scared and I started teasing him about it. Then we started wrestling, pretending we were gonna toss each other off the cliff. Myles foot slipped. He was so startled when he began to fall backwards that he reached for my feet and hit his head on the rocky cliffside.” He buries his face in his hands again, burying the shame. “It was my fault, but I panicked and called my dad before I called 9-1-1. My dad convinced me to say it was an accident.”
If there is one thing that will comfort Adam right now it’s for me to share my secret. It’s so obvious, but I can’t. I can’t judge him after what I’ve done, but I also can’t expect him not to judge me.
I put my hand under his chin and lift his face. His face is red and his eyes are brimming with unreleased tears. “Adam, it wasn’t your fault. It was an accident. It’s not as if you pushed him off.”
“That’s not the point. The point is my father refused to let me tell the truth about Myles’ death. And now that I’m finally getting my life back together, now that I have you, he wants to take it all away.”
“You have your degree. You’re young. You’re smart. You’re good looking. You can probably work anywhere. Why do you stay there?”
He shakes his head. “Don’t you get it? The company has been in the family for more than a hundred years; started by my great-great-grandfather. Nothing is more important to my dad than the company. I can’t leave. My dad has been holding what happened with Myles over my head for more than four years.”
The bedroom door opens and a girl with dark-blonde hair is standing there crying with an expression of rage contorting her dainty features.
“Jamie?” Adam says as he stands from the bed.
“You’re the reason he died?” she says, glaring at him. “I’ve been blaming myself for four years because I was the one who told him to enter that fucking competition and now I find out you’re the one who pushed him off.”
“I didn’t push him off, Jamie. You didn’t hear everything.”
“I heard enough. Get the fuck out of my room!” She opens the door wide and doesn’t look at me as she says, “And take your next victim with you.” Adam moves toward her and she pushes him hard in the chest. “Get out!”
Only Margaret questions why Adam and I aren’t staying for the picnic, but she seems fine with Adam’s explanation that he’ll tell her later. The three-hour drive back to Wrightsville is filled with a silence so heavy I can barely breathe under the weight of it. I don’t think anything can make this weekend worse, until I walk into my apartment and find the certified letter on the breakfast bar.
Chapter Fourteen
Relentless Demands
“The deposits have been coming for almost seventeen years, plus interest.”
“How much?” I demand.
“Two hundred and seventeen thousand, two hundred twenty-nine dollars… and eight cents.”
I stare at the letter on the counter sent from Northstar Bank in Raleigh notifying me of a trust account I will gain access to on my twenty-first birthday. Adam stands behind me rubbing my shoulders as I sit at the breakfast bar with my phone clutched to my ear.
After he carried the suitcase into my apartment and left me with nothing but a quick kiss on the cheek yesterday, I opened this letter and immediately called him to come back. He stayed up with me until three in the morning, though we didn’t really have much to say and the curse of having a roommate-ready bedroom meant we had to sleep in separate twin beds. But right now, the sensation of his hands kneading the tension in my shoulders is enough to make me forget everything that happened at his uncle’s ranch yesterday.
“My mother was not rich. This doesn’t make sense. Who deposited the money into that account?”
“I can’t disclose personal information about the beneficiaries, donors, or trustees over the phone. You’re going to have to come in and show two forms of photo identification.”
I curse myself as I think of all the times Senia begged me to renew my driver’s license. “I don’t have two forms of ID, unless you’ll accept an expired college ID and an expired driver’s license.”
Henry, the bank manager, lets out an exasperated sigh. “Claire, only because I knew your mother and how much she loved you will I allow this. Come in on your birthday with both your expired IDs and another person with two valid forms of ID and I’ll give you what you need.
”
I hang up the phone feeling lost. I grew up in a tiny rundown trailer on a lot surrounded by acres of forest. Our nearest neighbor must have been at least a quarter mile away because it felt like it took a million years to get there on foot every time we visited “Grandma” Patty. Nothing about the way we lived gave me any indication that my mother had money, but what Henry just said to me didn’t imply that she did. He said the deposits had been coming in for almost seventeen years. My mother has been dead for more than thirteen years. Someone else was making those deposits.
Once I tell Adam the stipulations, he quickly offers to go with me to Raleigh for my birthday. “That’s perfect because the birthday present I want to give you is in Raleigh.”
I don’t bother asking what he’s getting me because I know he’ll only refuse to tell me, but I’m more than a little apprehensive about turning twenty-one now.
I twist around on the barstool so I’m facing him and I can see the insecurity in his eyes—the look that’s been there since we left his uncle’s house yesterday. He’s wondering if I’m judging him because of what happened to his friend Myles four years ago.
“I’m sorry about what happened to your friend. And I’m sorry you’ve had to live with that for four years. But most of all, I’m sorry that I can’t share my secret with you the way you’ve shared yours with me.” He shakes his head and opens his mouth to say something, but I press a shaky finger to his lips. “But I want you to know that I do love you. And it scares the hell out of me to feel this way about someone I’ve known all of three weeks.”
He grabs my hand and moves my finger away from his lips. “It doesn’t have to make sense; it only has to make you happy. Are you happy?”
I grab the front of his T-shirt and pull him closer so my knees are hugging his hips. “I’m happier than a pig in mud.”
He smiles as he grabs the sides of my waist. “You’ve been spending too much time with Cora?”
I gaze into his eyes willing him to hear my thoughts. He stares back at me, a bit confused at first by my intense gaze, but then he sees it. He crushes his lips against mine and opens his mouth slowly. The pressure and heat of his lips sends a wave of chills coursing through me and I wrap my arms and legs around him, pulling him closer.
His hands slide under my shirt to undo my bra as he kisses my neck. As soon as the snap breaks loose, I peel off my shirt and bra and toss them onto the carpet. I lean my back against the cool tile of the breakfast bar and he takes my nipple into his mouth as he rolls my other nipple between his fingertips. I tighten my legs around his waist as the moisture builds between my thighs. He slides his hands under my butt and lifts me off the barstool. I kiss him greedily as he carries me to the bedroom.
He sits me down on the edge of the bed and stands so he can peel his shirt off as I undo the button and zipper on his cargo shorts. His erection is a massive bulge under his boxer briefs. I want to unwrap it, but I’m a bit frightened by the size of that bulge. He must see the apprehension in my face because he chooses to leave his briefs on for the time being as he kneels before me.
“Stand up,” he demands.
He slowly removes my shorts and panties as he plants a soft kiss on each of my hips. He presses his lips to my stomach just underneath my belly button and my nipples instantly stiffen. Taking my hand in his, he lays a soft kiss on my knuckles as he looks up at me.
“Sit down,” he murmurs, and I quickly obey. As soon as I’m seated on the edge of the bed, he spreads my legs and kisses the inside of my knee. “I love you, Claire. I want to make you happier than you’ve ever been.”
He lays a trail of kisses over the inside of both my thighs before he rests my legs on top of his shoulders and goes straight for my aching clit.
“Oh, Adam,” I moan.
He kisses and licks me slowly, taking his time, savoring every inch of me as I arch my back. He thrusts two fingers inside me and massages me to the same rhythm of his tongue. My arms begin to weaken from leaning back on my hands. I lower myself down to my elbows as his tongue swirls around my clit and my hips buck against his fingers.
“I’m gonna come,” I whimper. “Don’t stop.”
The orgasm rolls through me like the sizzle of a fuse being lit followed by an intense explosion of pleasure. He grips my thighs tightly, not pulling his mouth away until my body stops convulsing. He lets my legs slide off his shoulders as his chest glides over me. He kisses me hard and I can taste the coffee we drank this morning and myself. His tongue thrusts in and out of my mouth and I grab his perfect ass to pull him down on top of me.
“Please,” I whisper into his mouth as I reach down and slide my hand inside his briefs.
