Chapter Seven
He was kissing Drew.Holy shit. KissingDrew.Drew, who was his best friend, his partner in crime, the person he loved most in the entire world. Drew, who apparently knew how to kiss better than anyone Sebastian had ever locked lips with, becausefuck.
Every sensation was individually perfect - the lean heat pressed against Bas’s chest, the roughness of the jaw under Bas’s hand, the power in the hands, locked into fists around Bas’s shirt near his waist. It should have all felt strange - the stubble, the whipcord strength, and it did, but there was also a feeling of absolute rightness - homecoming, even - and that made the strangenessexciting.
Bas tilted his head down slowly, not wanting to miss a second of Drew’s reaction - the way the wide brown eyes Bas loved to look at grew stormy with heat and arousal, the way his lips -had they always been that smooth, one slightly larger than the other?- parted slightly in surprise andanticipation.
Drew is beautiful, he realized. And then their lipsmet.
Bas groaned helplessly, heart in his throat, and tasted Drew’s lips with his tongue. No cinnamon this time, just Drew. Sweet and tangy andperfect.
It was the most natural thing in the world for him to lift his hand from Drew’s waistband to cup the back of his neck, to toy with the short hairs at his nape. It required no thought for him to lean in, when Drew’s hands moved to splay across Bas’s lower back, erasing the last bit of distance between them. And it was total instinct that had him rubbing his erection against the corresponding length he felt beneath Drew’s sweatpants, and pushing him back against thewall.
Drew broke away with a tortured moan, and Bas inhaled greedily. Lust had stolen the breath from his lungs. “Christ, yes,” he said hoarsely, his lips moving to taste the skin beneath Drew’s ear. “Drew—”
He thrust harder, thrilling at the way Drew canted his hips, increasing the friction. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d felt so mindless with want, except for those few brief moments onHalloween.
He returned his mouth to Drew’s, eating at him like a starving man. The noises Drew was making, whimpers and groans that seemed to come from deep in his chest, spurred Bas on like nothing everhad.
Drew pulled his head back, just slightly. “Oh, fuck. Bas, I’m goingto…”
“Yes.Yes.” He was going to make Drew come. And it wasamazing.
Bas was nearly out of his mind. He thrust against Drew faster, harder, holding him against the door, their faces so close they were sharing breath and their gazes locked together as Drew’s brown eyes widened. Bas felt him jerk and shudder as he came, just moments before Basfollowed.
For a second, Drew let their foreheads rest together as they panted, undone. But when Bas lowered his mouth for a kiss, Drew’s hands came up to Bas chest and pushed them apart. “Stop. Stop,Sebastian.”
“No—"God, not now. Not when it felt like they were on the edge of some emotional precipice. Not when he finally thought he could share all the things he’d been thinking about and worrying over, all the dawning hope he’d begun tofeel.
“Yes.” Drew’s voice was breathless but insistent. Firm. “Back up.Please.”
Bas shifted back inches, his dizzy mind trying to catch up to Drew’s. “What’s wrong?Why?”
“I have to go,” Drew said, pushing Bas back anotherpace.
“Drew, don’t do that. That’s the stupid bullshitIdid. Talk to me,” Bas pleaded, grasping Drew’s arms. “I know this scenario is…” He moved a hand to indicate the wall, and the damp sweatpants sticking to both of them. “Well, it’s not exactly the stuff of dreamshere.”
Drew laughed, a single huff that was more bitter than amused. “You have no idea, Sebastian. None. But we can’t do this.” He shook his head, panic in his eyes. “It’s funtonight, sure, but what happens tomorrow morning? Or the next day? When the experiment is over and you realize that it’s wrong foryou?”
“I w—.”Wouldn’t, Bas had been about to say, but that was ridiculous, wasn’t it? Because history showed that was exactly what happened whenever they got tooclose.
Bas closed his eyes and cursed past-Sebastian for the fucking idiot hewas.
“You’re jealous of Mark and Gary, because you don’t want anyone to take your place in my life.” Drew continued, his voice fifty shades of reasonable though his eyes were wild. “It makes sense. And what happened tonight? Kissing is kissing. Friction is friction. This doesn’t mean you’re really attracted to me,personally.”
No, Bas was pretty sure he clued in about the attraction when he realized he could get high from the way Drew kissed, from the feeling of their bodies pressed together, and from the way he wanted to touch Drew’s bare skin with hishands.
But a sound like a record scratch halted his thought process while he contemplated the possible next steps. After nakedness came mouths and sex and… all kinds of things that were almost as scary as they were exciting. And he didn’t have the first clue about any of them. Not with a guy. Not withDrew.
“There are things we can’t come back from,” Drew was saying. “We almost lost each other because a single kiss on Halloween freaked you out, and I’m saying right here and now, I cannot handle having you walk away from me again. I can’t do it. So, whatever’s prompting your desire to experiment, you’ve gotta ask yourself if it’s worth throwing away decades of ourfriendship.”
“Throwing away? Drew,no.”
But Drew wasn’t really hearing him. His face was closed off, shutdown.
“So we, what? Just pretend nothing happened?” Bas laughed. The idea was ludicrous. As long as he lived, he was sure he would never forget what had happenedtonight.
But Drew nodded, serious as a train wreck. His eyes were wide, shell-shocked, and he ran an unsteady hand through his hair. “That’s exactly what we need to do. We need to back up a-and assess what’s happening here.” He spun around, collecting the suit and tie he’d laid over the leather side-chair after changing, shoving his feet into his shiny dress shoes, which looked ridiculous with his dirty borrowed sweats and ratty t-shirt.
