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And from the look of things in the bay area, shit had gone from bad to worse. Solo had Utah backed up against the wall, the straps of Utah’s harness in his tight grip, and he looked two seconds away from bashing the guy’s face in. Something that would get him discharged from the program.

“Solo, let him go.”

It was like he didn’t even hear me. I picked up the pace, rushing toward them. Solo’s entire body was vibrating with rage, and I knew it wasn’t entirely Utah’s fault, even though the guy was a mouthy shit. Whatever had been eating Solo up was finally breaking free, but using his fist on Utah wasn’t the way to get a release.

“He’s not worth it,” I said as I stopped beside him, holding my hands up like I was taming a wild animal. I used the same words he’d said to me when I’d had enough of Utah’s shit too. Hopefully they’d work as well on him as they had on me. “He’s not fucking worth it, Solo. Let him go.”

Time seemed to slow, and I held my breath as I waited to see what Solo would do. I was close enough to interfere if I had to, but I was hoping it wouldn’t come to that.

After what felt like forever, I saw it, the change in Solo’s eyes as he looked at me. Behind all that rage still simmering was the anxiety I’d been sensing from him, along with… No, it couldn’t be fear. What could Solo possibly be afraid of?

Solo slowly dropped his arm and then faced Utah—who had the good sense to keep his mouth shut for the moment—and let go of the harness. As Solo stepped back and took in a deep breath, I shot Utah a glare.

“Get out.”

I didn’t have to tell him twice, though he shook his head, a smug look on his face. Once he was out of the bay, I reached for Solo’s arm, wanting to give him some comfort, but he pulled away from me. Running his hands through his hair, he turned his back to me. All I could do was watch the way his body expanded as he took in several more deep breaths.

“What’s going on? Talk to me.”

Solo kicked off his boots and then peeled off his flight suit, his silence deafening. I’d been trying to pinpoint the change in him, what I could’ve possibly done, but all I could trace it back to was the day he’d gone out to grab a few things from the store. Had he run into Utah? Or someone else? It just didn’t make sense, and he wasn’t talking to me, so…what the fuck.

“I know whatever this is isn’t just about what happened in the air.”

With his back still to me, Solo snorted. “Sure it is.”

“Then how do you explain your mood for the last couple of days?”

Solo slammed his fist against the locker so hard that the sound echoed off the walls. “What the fuck do you want from me?”

“I want you to tell me what’s going on. You won’t even look at me.”

“Can’t I just be pissed I fucking lost up there? Isn’t that enough?”

“No. Everyone does eventually—”

“I don’t.”

“It’s not a big deal—”

“It is to me,” Solo thundered, the rage back and overflowing into the space between us. I’d never seen this side of him before. Annoyed Solo? Sure. Pissed Solo? Definitely. But tormented Solo was a new one.

“Solo, look at me.”

He dropped his head into his hand, rubbing his face, his back still the only part of him he’d let me see.

“Please,” I said, wanting so badly to touch him but forcing myself to stay where I was. “Just look at me.”

Finally Solo turned around, but it was clear he was on the defensive. He crossed his arms and his eyes met mine. There was an emptiness lurking there now, and I didn’t understand it. I didn’t know what the hell had changed. All I could feel was this gnawing in my gut that told me I was losing him and there was nothing I could do about it.

I swallowed hard and said the words I dreaded the response to: “Is it me?”

For a moment I didn’t think he was going to answer, but then he opened his mouth, and his words were colder than I’d even imagined.

“Yeah, you know what? It is.”

I felt as though he’d punched me in the chest, all the breath leaving my lungs in a whoosh. “What?”

“I’m all up in my head, unable to focus because of you. I never lose, and definitely not to a jerk-off like Utah, but I lost my shit today, and why? Because I can’t stop thinking about you.”

Too stunned to say anything, I could only stare as Solo paced the room, venting all the frustration he’d been keeping inside. Which was what I’d wanted, right?

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