‘I didn’t see her on any panels, so I can only assume she was there to learn, like me.’ He flopped his head to the table. ‘Oh, I don’t know.’
‘It’s okay, we’ll figure it out.’
‘We don’t have to do anything, Lott. She said she’d be back soon. I can speak to her then.’
‘No, Spence. We need to find her as soon as possible. She’s obviously not well or struggling somehow to dump her baby. She needs help. Maybe she’s in a dangerous situation or something. We can’t just wait around to see if she pops back up.’
Spencer straightened. He’d been so preoccupied with finding out he had a son, wondering what to do next, and talking to his sister, he didn’t stop to think the mother might be in danger. He glanced once more over her written words. ‘She said she just needed some time.’ Saying the words out loud somehow comforted him. ‘He’s so young, she probably got a bit overwhelmed with it all.’ He hoped it was something as simple as that.
Lottie sighed. ‘I’ll be there soon.’
‘No need. It’s late, and he’ll want a bottle in a couple of hours, then we’ll all need some sleep. I’m not doing anything about this till morning, so you might as well come round then.’
‘Spencer, please call someone.’
‘In the morning. Just let him settle here tonight. Like I said, it’s late.’
‘But what if she’s hurt?’
A pain hit his temple. He couldn’t think about that. A baby needed him. His baby, by all accounts. And something told him the mother would return. Maybe it was hope, but it was what heheld on to as he hung up his call and turned once more to stare into the pram.
Chapter 8
Beth
‘I can’t believe this!’ yelled Pearl.
It had been the worst night of Beth’s life. She was sure her mind had left her altogether. Not much else could explain the madness.
Pearl’s dark hair was almost touching her cheek, she was bent over so close, and Beth wanted to flick it away. Flick her cousin away, but she had made the mistake of calling her, and now she had to suffer the consequences. Not that anything Pearl said mattered. She could scream the building down and yell out all sorts of insults, but nothing would make Beth feel as bad as she already did.
‘Beth, you need to get up. Do you hear me?’ Pearl tried to drag her off the sofa, but Beth groaned and pulled away.
‘Please leave me,’ she whispered, a wedge of guilt lodged in her throat. ‘I don’t want to do anything.’
‘You have to do something. You can’t stay in this state.’ Pearl gave up tugging and flopped to the other end of the seat. ‘You left your baby with a stranger. I need you to talk to me so I can go get him back.’
‘He’s safe. With his dad.’
Pearl’s dark eyes widened. ‘What do you mean,his dad? You told me you didn’t know who his dad was. One-night stand, wasn’t it? You being footloose and fancy free, right? Flipping heck, Beth, wake up!’
Beth groaned to an upright position, sinking her body as close to the arm of the seat as possible so she wasn’t touching Pearl. It was understandable her cousin would be fuming, but there was no way Pearl would understand the reasons for the abandonment. Beth couldn’t understand it much herself.
All night, she thought she’d be able to breathe more freely, but that didn’t work. The long, cold walk home hadn’t snapped her out of zombie mode, and staring at the ceiling for the best part of the night only drained her even further.
Beth looked to the door, half expecting men in white coats to burst in and carry her away. If only someone could make her mind work properly again. Perhaps feel. She was so numb, tired, lonely, and quite possibly the worst person on the planet.
Pearl’s words weren’t sinking in much. Everything fading in and out. All Beth wanted was to curl up and be left to die. She didn’t deserve any kind words or sympathy from her cousin. She just needed quiet.
‘That will be Jan,’ said Pearl.
Beth became alert. ‘Who?’ Her bloodshot eyes moved to the doorway as she realized someone was knocking on her front door.
‘I told you I called Raj’s friend, January Riley. She’s here to help.’ Pearl moved to open the door, and Beth felt too exhausted to care. ‘She’s a therapist,’ added Pearl. ‘What you need right now.’
Before Beth had time to blink, a middle-aged woman with dark eyes was smiling gently down at her. Beth focused on the woman’s mass of blonde curls, thinking them pretty against the woman’s dark skin. Her own head was greasy and no doubt smelled.
‘Hello, Beth. I’m January Riley, but everyone calls me Jan.’ She sat on the sofa while Pearl announced she was off to make some tea. ‘How you feeling?’
