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Aren’t I embracing my new self? Raw honesty and truth. No more hiding? Be brave enough to make mistakes, fall down, and get back up?
“Olivia… You can tell me. I won’t judge you, I swear.”
Something in her voice makes me look at her. Lana smiles—a soft, sad smile—and an answering ache blooms in my chest.
She knows already.
I take a deep breath and gather my courage.
“I…I love Rex. I know I’m not supposed to. He’s my patient. There are rules. Boundaries. Ethics. But he makes me feel so much and I…I—”
“Oh, sweetie.” She pulls me into a hug as tears slide down my cheeks.
Everything catches up to me—the events of the last few weeks, my call with Mom earlier, the things I’ve learned about myself, how deprived I was of acceptance, and how deep I’ve buried my feelings. Then there’s the grief from losing Mia, from losing my identity to my parents and the world. Finally, the ecstasy and heartbreak I simultaneously feel with Rex, knowing our time is limited because he’s unwilling to fix whatever’s plaguing him.
It’s overwhelming.
The tears become sobs as I shake in her arms.
“I’m going to kill him. I’ll find Rex and rip him a new one. I told him not to mess with you, that you aren’t a plaything—”
Shaking my head, I whisper, “He treats me like I’m precious.”
It might be easier if he treated me like the other women, a good time he didn’t care about.
“Then what’s wrong?”
My lips tremble and I tell her everything—well, as much as I can without violating confidences from my sessions with Rex. Lana is quiet as she listens, and true to her promise, she doesn’t pull away or appear to judge me. She nods when I tell her about Mia and her suicide, about my family, about feeling invisible because I’ve been trying to live for my lost twin, to not cause pain for my parents, who’ll always grieve for their dead child. I tell her about Rex—how he, for the first time, made me see colors I was blind to, made me believe Olivia Lin was bewitching just as herself.
And when everything is said and done, I lean against her shoulder and stare at the dark skies, now navy blue, the sunset long having disappeared.
“You know, I knew you guys were together. I just wanted to hear your side.”
I freeze, then look up.Myside? She’s talked to Rex?
Lana nods. “Maxwell and I got the truth out of him back in Tuscany.”
I gasp. Maxwell? Oh no. I’m going to lose my job, my reputation. This is bad. Well, it was bad all along, but this isbad.
Lana must see my panic because she pats my hand and says, “You guys weren’t exactly inconspicuous. Then Greg Masters threatened with the photo. It wasn’t hard to put two and two together. Rex fessed up when we asked him. I won’t lie and tell you we weren’t upset initially. A doctor being involved with her patient doesn’t look good, you know?”
“I’m sorry,” I look down, “for keeping this from you guys. But not for loving your brother. He’s a special man. He has so much love to give. A generous soul. It’s impossible not to love him.” It’s true. I have regrets, but none of them include loving Rex Anderson.
“Well, if there’s one thing I know by watching my siblings fall in love in impossible situations, sometimes life puts the right person in front of you at what seemingly is the wrong time or wrong place. But things have a way of working themselves out, as long as you follow your heart and live with no regrets. That’s all that matters, isn’t it?”
A soft breeze carries away her words, but they’ve burrowed deeply inside me already. “I must’ve disappointed you, Lana. I’m a board-certified doctor. I should know better. I’m—”
She squeezes my hand. “If emotions were easy to turn on and off, I think you’d be out of a job.”
We chuckle at that.
“Why are you single? I never asked before.” I nudge her side.
It’s nice to finally open up to someone. The world didn’t collapse.
She sighs, leans back, and stares at the stars in the sky. “Maybe I’m waiting for someone from a long time ago. It’s silly. They all leave… I just wish one would stay.”
Her answer is cryptic, and I wait for her to continue, but she doesn’t.
