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Fear sweeps through me. The situation sounds dangerous.

I practice deep breaths and cognitive behavioral therapy techniques.

It’s just a storm. We have the best of the best helming this cruise ship. There’s nothing to worry about.

I think back to Rex’s words that day at Dubrovnik.

“You’re a mirage. A temptress and a rule breaker trapped inside, waiting to be let out.”

I want to be the siren he’s describing. That woman would be fearless.

A thought niggles at me.

Good-girl Olivia stays warm and dry inside the stateroom. She eats the almond cookies she hates because that’s what she’s supposed to do.

But temptress Olivia? She’d embrace the chaos and call it excitement. She’d never force herself to do something she doesn’t want.

Huffing a deep breath, I grab the tin of cookies on my nightstand.

Twelve years.I’ve let the past trap me for twelve years. It’s time to let go.

I pad to the balcony door and slide it open. Within seconds, I’m wet—rain coats my face, my hair, soaks through my thin T-shirt and sweats.

My first instinct is to shut the door and yell at myself for being stupid.

But I don’t.

Instead, I step onto the balcony—holding onto the doorframe because I’mnotstupid—and let the weather lash my face.

I dump the cookies into the ocean, then set the tin on the ground. Guilt pricks me.

You’re not supposed to litter.

The birds can eat them.

Icy cold water pelts my skin. The wind howls. Lightning splits across the sky, and every inch of me comes alive.

Excitement bubbles in my chest. A laugh rips out of me.

It’s messy. It’s chaotic. My heart might short-circuit.

But I’m alive. I made a choice for myself.

I feel every single thing, and I love it.

Something is unraveling inside me, just like the storm outside, turning our world upside down.

A shrill alarm suddenly pierces the air, and I jolt, noticing red lights flashing outside the stateroom. Then I hear my phone ring.

Rushing back inside, I quickly pick up and answer thecall.

“Dr. Lin speaking.”

“We have an emergency on deck three. It’s legit all hands on deck. Can you come?” Jessa sounds panicked and I know it’s bad when the day shift nurses are working nights.

I change into fresh clothes and grab my windbreaker while Jessa debriefs me. Apparently, a few drunk passengers thought it’d be a good time to reenact a certain scene fromTitanicand, naturally, they fell overboard when a rogue gust caught them by surprise.

Seriously, Darwin Awards in action.