“I love you.” Her head pops up, and she looks at me. “I wasn’t planning on telling you that—it just came out. But now that I’ve said it, I can’t take it back. I love you so much it hurts.”
Her brows fold together, and tears fill her eyes. “What are you—”
“I know it’s not what you want to hear, but I just need you to know. At least once. You asked why falling in love can’t be easy. Falling in love with you was the easiest thing I’ve ever done. So easy that I didn’t even know it was happening at first, and then I did, but I didn’t care because you’re you, and you fit perfectly with me.”
“No.” She shakes her head as one tear falls down her cheek. “You can’t say that. Justin is—”
“My brother. I know. Justin is my brother, and he’s a great guy too, but that doesn’t stop me from loving you.”
Another tear falls. “What am I supposed to do with that? It’s crazy.” She puffs out a humorless laugh as a new tear drips down her face.
I step in front of her, holding her ice-cold hands. “It is crazy. But I’d rather our love storybe crazy than easy.”
“Ourlove story? Caleb, he’s your twin brother.”
“I know, and it sucks.” My eyes go misty. “It sucks big time. Trust me, no one knows how much it sucks more than me. But I still want you, despite the messiness, despite the hurt feelings, because you’re happy, caring, sweet, fun, silly, and you’ve made me fall in love with Christmas and your family right alongside falling in love with you.”
“I can’t.” Two tears fall, and she swipes the remnants away. “I can’t do that to him. Being with Justin was always the end plan. It’s the entire reason we did the swap.”
“Justin will be fine.”
“How do you know?”
“Because he doesn’t love you like I do. And he certainly doesn’t make you happy.”
“I’m happy.”
“You’re not. Not like you are when you’re with me.” I place my hands on her shoulders, dipping my head down to see into her eyes. “Summer, we could be wild and crazy and madly in love together. Just imagine it. Imagine how happy we’d be together.”
She shakes her head, her voice shaky from emotion. “You only think you’re in love with me because it’s Christmas.”
“Don’t do that.” I pull back.
“No, it’s true. It’s just the magic of the season that’s making you feel this way.”
“Don’t say that.” It’s my turn to shake my head. “I don’t want you to say that, because I know these feelings between us aren’t because of Christmas magic. They’re real. You’ve felt them too.” I gently cup her cheeks. “I know you’ve felt it too. I’ve seen it in your eyes.”
Her face is stone, except for the tears as she keeps up with her same reverie. “When the holidays are over, and you go back to your regular life, you’re going to realize I’m right.”
“I don’t want to go back to my regular life. I want to spend my life with you.”
“Caleb.” Her lip quivers with emotion, and I know what she’s about to say. “Caleb, I can’t.” She shrugs innocently, like the thousand other innocent things I’ve watched her do the last few weeks. “I can’t do that to Justin. It’s not possible.”
I drop my hands. “You’re taking the easy way out.”
More tears spill down her cheeks. “It doesn’t feel easy.”
“You’re making a mistake.” I shake my head. “He doesn’t love you like I do.”
“Stop saying that.” She closes her eyes, squeezing the moisture out. “You don’t know that.”
“I know he doesn’t appreciate all the little things I love about you. How you toss your hair to one side without even knowing it. How you match different shades of red lipstick to whatever color you’re wearing that day. How you think of others and react with genuineness every time.” Her lips tremble as tears roll down her face one after the other, but I don’t stop. I can’t walk away until she understands how much I completely adore her. “Justin doesn’t stay awake at night and wonder what kind of earrings you’ll be wearing the next day. Or look at the cute calendar you made a hundred times a day just to make sure he doesn’t miss one second of hanging out with you. Or wish that you’d make him a calendar full of cute little graphics for every single month of the year, just as proof that you’re going to spend every day together. He doesn’t love how you’re up for anything, even if it means getting yourself kicked out of somewhere. He doesn’t appreciate how happy you are or how your sunshine touches everyone around you. And I know he doesn’t appreciate your love and devotion to your family like I do.”
Summer still shakes her head like my words aren’t enough, so I say more, hoping that something will make her see. “I get it. You’ve been together a long time. So it might feel easier to stay with him. But, Summer, I don’t need nine months to get to know you. It only took me a few days to fall head over heels for you.”
“But you don’t even live here. You have an adventurous life all around the world. That’s not me. That’s not who I am.”
“Do you think I care about any of that?” I grab her hands again. “You’re what I’ve been missing. You’re the relationship that I want to create and put first. I only want to be right where you are.”
