“Unfortunately, no, love. That wasn’t part of the agreement.” I roll onto my back and stare up at the ceiling, unable to continue looking at her. “Regardless of what rumors might float around court, I would never take a woman to bed who did not wish it.”
The subtle scoff has me tilting my head toward her, and I note that she’s rolled onto her back as well. I study her profile as she says, “You’ll only get into bed with one without permission.”
Some of her fire is coming back, and that makes my heart happy. The heavy sadness has been hard to bear, especially when there’s nothing I can do to fix it.
My gaze is drawn to her pert nipples, visible through the thin fabric of her sleep shift, tempting me to draw them into my mouth. Does she realize the blanket slid down? I squeeze my eyes shut and retort, “Well, this isn’t the first time we’ve shared a bed.”
“What?” she squeaks and turns her head to face me.
“We were trying to make our love convincing.”
“Oh.” She flushes a pretty shade of red yet again.
Fuck. It’s pure torture lying next to her, wanting her . . . knowing she’s forgotten everything, again. Perhaps it’s for the best. This way, she no longer remembers my role as the Shadow. My mind flashes back to the betrayal on her face when she discovered my secret. Nearly every person in her life has either lied to or betrayed her. I can’t do it again. I will come clean to her, but now . . . now, I need to get out of this bed before I do something I regret.
I take a deep breath and sit up, planting my feet on the floor. “There is something we need to discuss, I’m afraid.”
The sheets rustle and the bed moves as Raelyn sits up. “That sounds serious.”
“If you’d like to join me for breakfast, we can discuss it then.”
After we’veboth bathed and dressed, Raelyn finally joins me in our common area. Giles has procured an incredible spread of food, and my mouth waters at the smell.
“Please, have a seat.” I motion toward her usual spot. I hate how new things feel again.
“Thank you,” she says, reaching for her favorite pastry.
I fill my plate with eggs and potatoes, sprinkling a healthy dose of cheese on top that melts beautifully.
“Well, I guess I’ll just get to it,” I say between bites.
She pauses, the croissant halfway to her mouth before she sets it back down. “You’re making me nervous, Kian.”
“I’m sorry, love. I wish I had better news . . . but this memory thing has put us in quite a bit of a predicament.”
“How so?” she frowns.
“Well, my father expects you to testify as to what happened with Lord Havordshire, the man who . . .”
She pales. “But how? I don’t remember.”
I grimace as I set down my fork. “Sera saw him attacking you, but she didn’t see much, and there’s no proof that you weren’t there willingly with him.”
She picks at the croissant on her plate, her face a shade of green I’ve never seen before.
“Hells, I’m sorry, Rae. I wish I didn’t have to tell you.”
“So, what?” She blinks back the beginning of tears. “He gets away with what he did, with poisoning me, stealing my memories, and I get accused of infidelity and possibly hanged?”
“Never!” I spit out vehemently. “I won’t allow it.”
Her body shudders, and I so badly want to pull her into my arms and give her comfort. But she hasn’t asked for it, and I already crossed the line sharing her bed.
“What do I do?” she asks, the brokenness in her voice killing me.
“I’ll do my best to talk the king down, but in the meantime, I’ve sent for your father. Perhaps if he can tell us what exactly you were dosed with, we can find a cure for your memories.”
“I still can’t believe he would have had anything to do with the attack,” she says. “Do you think there’s a chance he knows what could help?”
