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“Did you sleep well?” William asked after a moment.
She swallowed prematurely and the hot liquid burned her throat. Grimacing a bit, she managed to nod. “I slept well, thank you,” she said to him, though she was certain he could see her swollen eyes. They’d gone down considerably since she’d woken up but Elizabeth knew they wouldn’t escape his notice.
Not wanting him to ask about it, she tried to divert the topic. “Why are we breaking fast out here?” she asked. “First it was the drawing room, then the dining room, and now the gardens?”
William took a moment to respond. His silence stretched on for so long that Elizabeth couldn’t help but glance up at him. Butterflies filled her stomach when she saw that he was still staring at her. But afterwards, he broke eye contact and reached for a crumpet.
“My late stepmother was quite the eccentric sort. She did not enjoy having a repetitive life and had fallen into the habit of starting her day in a different part of the manor each morning. It was what I liked most about her. So, I have adopted the practice in her memory.”
“Your stepmother…” Elizabeth tried to suppress her surprise that he was actually telling her something. “She was the Duchess of Brandon, was she not?”
He nodded. “She was. Following the passing of her father, the Dukedom should have reverted back to the crown, but the Prince Regent was quite fond of my stepmother. He agreed to have the title passed to my father and have me as the heir if there was no other child of the union.” He huffed a humorless laugh. “It was as if Fate did all that it could to ensure that I found myself in this position.”
Elizabeth couldn’t decipher the tone of his voice. Now it was her time to study him, to see if there was something wrong which would explain why he was telling her all this so suddenly. “Her Grace must have been a lovely lady,” she murmured.
“She was many things and lovely was certainly one of them. She did not deserve what she was given.”
“What do you mean?”
William polished off the crumpet and reached for another without hesitation. “Tell me the truth. How well did you sleep last night? It appears as if you might have cried.”
Elizabeth flushed and averted her gaze. Talking about his stepmother had distracted her for a moment but now her shame was back with full force. She suddenly wished she’d given in and claimed she felt too ill to leave her bed, even though she knew he would detect the lie instantly.
“It’s nothing,” she told him half-heartedly. “I can be a little emotional at times.”
William finished his crumpet and reached for a piece of toast without taking his eyes off her. “Retur—”
“Do not even dare.”
He said nothing for a moment, as if taken by the venom in her voice. Elizabeth could hardly believe it herself. After a moment, he began again, “If you are afraid of what the ton might say when they’ve learned of where you’ve been, you need not worry. I have a plan—”
Elizabeth looked sharply at him, her breath hitching in her throat. To her absolute horror, tears threatened to pinch her eyes again and she looked away as quickly as she could, distracting herself by smearing too much preserves onto her toast. “You know I cannot do that,” she mumbled.
“I must admit, I faltered for a moment.” William paused, his tone utterly serious, and in her blurring peripherals she saw him shake his head. “No, not only for a moment. From the second I spotted you, I knew it would be difficult to push you away, even though I knew that I needed to. I suppose the fight I put up was quite lackluster, all things considered.”
“William…” That was what frightened her the most. He didn’t sound angry, he didn’t sound frustrated. He sounded like a man who’d thought long and hard about his decision and now, nothing would sway his mind. Elizabeth grappled to find something that would stop him from saying the words she knew were to come.
“But,” he went on, “that was my shortcoming. Now, I see that I was simply being selfish letting you stay here. I’d even had gowns prepared for you and for that, Elizabeth…I must apologize.”
Elizabeth swallowed past the lump forming in her throat. She’d long since lost her appetite and so she set the knife and toast down, blinking her tears away before lifting her gaze to him. Fear seized her, threatened to turn her into a crying mess. But she didn’t dare to give in to it. Not after she’d cried her eyes out last night. Not after the kissed they’d shared.
“William, what are you doing?”
He met her gaze, his face unmoving. He didn’t stop eating. It was as if, while she could not bear to eat, he needed to in order to distract himself from his emotions. “I’m doing exactly what I should have done from the very beginning, Beth,” he told her. “I wish to share one more meal with you before we part ways once more. I hope it shall be a cordial one, even enjoyable one.”
