Winston stumbled over to the vanity, ripping off his cravat and unbuttoning his waistcoat as fast as possible. He needed air—fast. At last, his waistcoat was off, and he collapsed in the chair, gulping in lungfuls of air. He put his head in his hands andclosed his eyes until at last, his breathing began to regulate, and he felt his heart rate start to slow.
He looked up into the mirror, meeting his own gaze in it. His eyes were stormy, his expression murderous.
He could never bring Clementine back. He knew that. But there might just be a way to finally put to rest his guilt and anger at her death. If he did not, he was afraid he would be haunted by it the rest of his life—consumed by guilt and the certainty that he would fail Vanessa in an equally tragic way.
He could not live like that. If he was ever going to have a real marriage with Vanessa, he had to face what had happened with Clementine and rid himself of this regret and shame.
He would have to make Lord Egerton pay—with his life. The Vigilantes of Virtue would have to ride one last time.
Chapter Twenty-Five
“No. Absolutely not.”
Leo was sitting across from Winston, shaking his head, a look of shocked horror on his face. “How can you even suggest it?”
“You know how I can suggest it,” Winston growled. “The man drove my sister to her death!”
“I know that, but he is an old man now and sickly. It would not be right to harm him physically.”
“Not right?” Winston gazed incredulously at his friend. “Who cares that he is old? He was already old when he used to beat my sister—but I still challenged him to a duel then.”
“That was ten years ago.”
“He was still old then.”
“It is not just that,” Leo said, glancing around the parlor of White’s to make sure no one was listening in on them. “There is also the factthe Bow Street Runners are after us.”
Winston tossed his head. “Who cares? It is not as if they are watching all of our movements.”
“Yes, they are,” Leo insisted.
“You are paranoid. They do not have the resources for that kind of operation.”
Leo hesitated. “Maybe not,” he admitted, “but they are still tailing us, and if we sneak off in the middle of the night, they will know what we are up to. Not to mention the fact Lord Egerton is known to them as your enemy. If he were to be attacked, they would use that as proof that you are one of the Vigilantes.”
Winston crossed his arms. His friend made a good point, but he was not willing to concede any of them. “I have to do this,” he said. “My sister must be avenged.”
Leo sat back in his chair and gazed at Winston for a long moment. “And what about your wife?” he asked softly. “If you are caught, she will be unprotected.”
Winston’s stomach lurched, but he tried not to let it show. “I will not get caught. And if I am, I will leave instructions behind ensuring that she is cared for and protected.”
“And what of Lord Langdon?”
“He has not shown himself since we returned to London,” Winston said dismissively, although inside, he felt more unease. It was true he did not like the idea of Langdon being able to access Vanessa if he were arrested. But right now, the need to avenge Clementine—and to put, once and for all, her death in the past—was stronger than any other need.
“Please, Leo,” he began. “You do not understand. As long as Egerton is out there, and my sister not avenged, I cannot be the husband Vanessa needs me to be. My conscience is not clean, and I must do this to prove to myself that I can follow through on my promises to protect the people I love.”
Leo’s eyes flickered with sympathy, and for a moment, Winston was sure he had convinced him, but then his friend shook his head. “I am sorry, Winston, but I cannot be part of this. It is too dangerous. You will be caught, and then you will not be able to honor your promises toherto protect her.”
Winston set his jaw. He knew his friend was right. He knew that this was a mistake. But he also knew that he had to do it.
However, there was something he could do for Leo to make sure that he was not implicated should something go awry.
“You are right,” he said at last, sighing and shaking his head. “I do not know what got into me. I think that seeing Egerton the other day made me temporarily lose my mind. I cannot do this. The Bow Street Runners will immediately know it is me, and if Iwas arrested and something should happen to Vanessa… I would never forgive myself.”
Leo looked immensely relieved as he reached for his drink on the table in front of him. “I am very glad to hear that,” he murmured, raising the drink and downing it. “You really had me scared there for a moment.”
“I was being selfish,” Winston said. “I will not bring it up again.”
