She kind of wanted to open it immediately, but she also kind of didn’t. It felt… too much. Maybe he had something to say that would make everything feel better, but maybe she’d just feel even worse afterwards.
She pulled her phone in against her chest and stared straight ahead.
There was a lot of screeching of brakes and movement of people. Her train was coming. She’d better get on it.
She stumbled into a seat near the door, still holding her phone against her, and then moved the phone out in front of her and looked again at the unopened email.
It was like her whole body and brain were too stunned to open it.I love youwas a strong phrase.
She put her phone down on her lap, turned it over and looked out of the window at rail-side buildings illuminated by street lights. Notthemost scenic view. Better than thinking about Dan, though.
Oh, for God’s sake. She was being ridiculous. If she didn’t read it now, she’d think about it the whole time and wonder and wonder and ruin her evening. Better toknowwhat he had to say.
From: Dan Marshall
To: Evie Green
Subject: I love you
Hi Evie,
I never told you how much I love you. I’ve written a letter that I’m going to deliver to you tomorrow.
I love you (and I miss you).
Dan
He loved her.
Wow. She didn’t know what to think.
What was his letter going to say? AnotherI love you? Or more?
When would he deliver the letter? And did she want to read it?
His life seemed somessy. Could she deal with that, if he wanted them to be together? She did love him. Shereallyloved him, which she’d never told him. But was that enough?
After that awful evening, when she’d effectively lost both Dan and Matthew for good, to her shame she’d thought very little about Matthew, because any feelings about him had been eclipsed by the utter devastation at the loss of her soul mate in Dan.
‘Arriving at Waterloo.’ Oh,shit. She’d missed her station. She should have got off at Vauxhall to switch to the Underground. Actually, she could just get on the Jubilee Line to go to Green Park. The station was heaving, though, and the Jubilee platform was a really long walk from here. Maybe she’d get a taxi. It felt like she deserved a little treat to cheer herself up after the shock of Dan’s email.
In afartoo expensive black cab – there was already eight quid on the clock and they’d barely moved; she’d just have got the Tube if she’d realised there’d be such a long queue at the taxi rank and it would cost this much – she texted her friends to let them know that she’d had a train issue but that she’d be there any minute. Bit of a fib if she was honest, because the traffic looked solid.
‘Who you meeting at the cinema?’ the taxi driver asked her.
‘Some girlfriends.’ Evie smiled at him in his rear-view mirror, feeling guilty about the fact that shereallydidn’t want to talk to him.
‘What film you going to watch then?’ Christ. Evie just wanted tothinkright now.
Forty-five minutes later, she’d made it into her seat in the auditorium just as the ads finished and the trailers started. She hadn’t had any time to buy any chocolate or popcorn, which was obviously a good thing given that this was right in the middle of the Christmas over-eating season, but she did still feel cheated.
She and Dan had chomped their way through alotof sweets when they’d been to the cinema together.
She looked at Priya, sitting to her right, as Dan had been when they went to the cinema.
Priya was lovely.
She wasn’t Dan, though.
