Mrs. Bennet moaned piteously.
Mrs. Phillips watched them all, her eyes glinting with something like happiness at how her sister’s family exposed themselves while she was present. But Elizabeth was beyond caring.
“Oh, oh, oh!” Mama spoke to Jane again, “If only Mr. Bennet had not made you go to Netherfield without the carriage — now we are all ruined, and—”
“You! Mama, you!” Elizabeth spoke over her. “I will never forget that it was youwho wished for Jane to go by horse, so she would be required to stay the night at Netherfield if it rained.You.”
“Now, Lizzy—”
“You did this! All for the pursuit of a worthless young man who determined he wanted nothing to do with my perfect sister within two minutes of the doctor proclaiming her sight was not likely to ever be restored.”
“What?” Now it was Jane who exclaimed.
Elizabeth had not meant to ever tell this part of the story directly to Jane. It could only leave her unhappy to know the full details of Bingley’s abandonment.
“Oh, oh, oh.” Mrs. Bennet moaned. “I knew it must be so. I knew it!”
“And it is your fault,” Elizabeth spat out.
“Lizzy, that is ridiculous, it was your papa who—”
“Lie to yourself, not to me.”
Cold silence.
Jane groped blindly for Elizabeth’s hand, and with her other arm she reached towards Mrs. Bennet. “Please, I beg you both. Please.”
Elizabeth sighed. “I will for you.”
“Now,” Mrs. Bennet took Jane’s hand. “Your sister is being most disrespectful — I have a notion to complain to Mr. Bennet. He is the only one who can control her. You dare call me a liar?”
“Mama, you just did not remember rightly,” Jane said with forced cheerfulness, “But you had wanted me to go without the carriage.”
“I never.”
“That is nothing of import. I already felt ill that day before I left, but I did not want to complain, and I did not think that what ailed me was contagious, and since no one else became ill, it must not have been.”
Elizabeth said, “Without the rain you would not have become so ill as you did.”
“Only God can know that — you certainly cannot,” Jane spoke quietly. Somehow her sightless eyes only strengthened the ordinarily serene impression that she gave. “Now I am quite tired, might you both help me to my bed? I must rest again. Mr. Thompson said I must have quiet.”
With a sensation of intense guilt, Elizabeth helped her sister up the stairs, holding onto her hand to guide her.
It should not be Jane’s place to be the peacekeeper.
“I… I know I shouldn’t have spoken like that to Mama,” Elizabeth said as she helped Jane sit on her bed. “I know, but I just…”
“Lizzy,” Jane said. “Just remember that Mama loves us both very dearly. And there really was nothing to be done.”
Elizabeth sat on the edge of Jane’s bed and held her hand. “I can stay and read you something.”
“Just—” Jane began speaking snappishly, but then cut herself off. “Please, you do not need to…” She waved her hand in a vague circle. “I am wholly well. I will be. But even though I cannot see you, I can sense you… worrying. Let me sleep.”
“But I do worry. And it is so—”
Jane took her hand and squeezed it warmly. “Thank you, Lizzy, but please… I want to rest.”
Elizabeth nodded and left the room, her gut churning with anxiety. Despite her pretense of acceptance, Jane was not well.
