Afew hours later, I wake to the suns beating down on me, drenched in sweat, and exhausted from a nightmare filled restless sleep. I wasn’t prepared to have the nightmares again, proving there is more than one reason I miss Weston’s bed.
Only one more night.
Rolling my shoulders, I try to loosen the tension in my neck brought on by the fitful sleep and the worry over the rest of this plan. My clothes are still the filthy ones I arrived in, too tired to do anything but go straight to sleep after last night. I need to start the day fresh, wash all the grime off and get a new set of clothes, anything that will make me look like I’m back in the fold and a Voyager once again.
A voice greets me as I hop down off the last rung of the ladder.
“I was just coming to get you,” Dane says. He sweeps me into a kiss, and I go through the motions, enough not to rouse suspicion, before pushing him away.
“I’m still filthy. I was just about to go clean up.”
“I’m sure you’ll feel better after you do. How did you sleep?” he asks.
I shrug. “Not great, honestly.”
He wraps an arm around my shoulder and pulls me into his side before setting off down the path toward the showers. “You’ve been through a lot, Lennox. It might take some time to calm down from it all, but I’ll be here for you.”
“Thanks Dane,” I say, keeping my eyes on the floorboards as we traipse through camp.
“I made Mara sleep in the cabin last night. She needs some time to cool down, and I didn’t want her making you feel uncomfortable.”
“After your threat to bring her home, I don’t think she will try anything. She doesn’t want to give up on the cure.” I make a mental note not to call it the healing waters. No one here does, not unless they’ve found it. Dane can’t know I have, so I can’t do or say anything that might catch his attention.
We round the bend to the showers and Dane sends me off, telling me he will meet me in the tavern once I’m finished.
Camp feels quiet and normal, like nothing has changed in the time I’ve been gone.
Except me.
I’ve changed.
But I can’t let anyone see how much.
I shower quickly, keeping my dagger hidden in my boot and pulling on a clean set of clothes before I start off toward the tavern. Dane is alone, food spread out on a table, as I slide onto the bench next to him, the same way I would have before.
“Hungry?”
“Starving,” I say and reach out to pull some food closer. I need energy to stay alert and focused, especially after a rough night of sleep. Hopefully, eating will help fuel me for the day ahead, but also give me something to do while I sit here with Dane.
“I’m just so relieved you’re back where you belong,” Dane says. He turns to straddle the bench facing me and pulls me toward him, draping my legs over his. I try not to stiffen, instead focus on giving him a soft smile.
“You know I didn’t leave on purpose. It wasn’t my choice,” I say and reach across the table to grab a piece of food, something, anything, to keep my hands and mouth busy. It isn’t a lie. I chose to stay after I found out the truth, but I still need to try to say as many truths as possible so I don’t get caught up and discovered.
“I know.” He strokes the tops of my thighs leisurely. Before I would have leaned into his touch, but now it takes every shred of control I have not to squirm away from it. “But I had to get you back. I don’t know what I’d do without you.”
Warnings fill my mind, ones I didn’t notice when he said things like this before. After I met him, and when I thought there was more between us, I was so caught up in the excitement and newness of meeting someone from outside the castle, making a friend, and seeking this magical place, that I let all of it cloud my judgment. My emotions overcame me, and I allowed them to control my perceptions instead of doing what I have been taught for years: using my mind and analyzing every piece of information.
Both Brynne and Weston are right. I let my emotions overcome me, but I have to heed their lesson in this fight. This is a fight, just one without the cut of a blade.
I shift the subject quickly. “What is the plan for today?”
“I figured you would want to lie low, recover. I don’t expect you to be rushing out of camp right away.”
“I can’t lose any more time, Dane. I have to find the cure.”
His face breaks out in a slow grin.
“What?” I ask warily, worried I said something that tipped him off to my deception.
