“You need to call Alex.” I shake my head like a maniac, the tears still streaming down my face. “Claire, you need to let him explain who’s in the picture. You misinterpreted it. It’s not what you think it is.”
“You talked to Alex? What did he say? What do you mean the picture is not what I think it is?” I whisper to him.
“Yes, he called me in a panic. He’s going crazy trying to reach you. It’s important that you let him explain, tell you who’s in the picture himself. He’s losing his mind worried about you.” I sit staring out the window. Why do I have to hear from him how he’s replaced me so easily. I just want to crawl into a quiet place and sleep for a year.
“Call him, Claire. Now!” Aiden growls, making me jump. “Then we’re stopping by a friend's house for a visit.” My hand shakes as I turn my phone back on. I’m shocked to see how many times Alex has tried to reach me. I push my speed dial for him, closing my eyes as I hear the international exchange ring.
“Hullo?” he almost yells into the phone. He’s much calmer when he speaks again. “Claire?”
“Yes,” I whisper as Aiden pulls away from the curb.
“Oh thank God, Claire. I’ve been trying tae reach ye all day. Listen, aboot that picture. Did ye look at it really well? Look at it closely, she should look a little familiar.”
“I don’t know who she is, Alex.” My breath is coming out in gasps. I feel Aiden take my hand, squeezing it gently.
“Claire, look at the picture again. The woman in it looks vaguely like me or Finlay. It’s Rory, Claire, my twin sister. She came tae stay with me for a wee bit. I would never cheat on ye. Ye have tae believe me. Look, George and Robbie are both here, I can put them on speaker. They can tell ye it’s Rory.” He sounds scared, but I don’t understand why.
Pulling the picture I printed out from my purse, I straighten it. I see how similar they are now. Why couldn’t I see it before? “Claire, please tell me ye can see it.” I nod my head.
“He can’t see you, sweetheart,” Aiden says softly to me.
“Y-yes,” I stammer into the phone. I hear him let out a slow breath.
“Good. Okay,” he says. There’s a pause before Alex adds, “I love ye, Claire. Ye remember that, right?” I start to nod again but remember he can’t see me.
“Yes.”
“You and me always, aye? Can ye hold on to that for me?”
“Yes,” I whisper as the tears start streaming down my face again. I’m so tired of crying all the time. I just want it to stop.
“Can ye hand the phone back to Aiden, baby? I love ye.”
“I love you, Alex,” I say, handing the phone back to my brother. I only half listen as they exchange a few brief words.
Soon we pull up to a spacious house in the suburbs of Portland. The front door is opened by a beautiful woman in her late fifties. She greets Aiden before holding a hand out to me. When we move into the house, I realize with a start that she is a psychiatrist friend of my brother’s.
“Aiden? What are we doing here?” I ask him, standing in her well-appointed study. Taking me by both hands, he leads me to the couch, sitting so we face each other.
“Alex and I feel you need someone to talk to about what happened,” he answers. My eyes grow wide when I hear that Alex told him what happened even though I asked him not to.
“Don’t be mad at him. He’s scared for you. He would never have called me if he wasn’t. I just don’t understand why you didn’t feel like you could share this with me. We’re your support, Claire. We want to be here for you,” he says.
The stupid tears start again when I see how much I’ve hurt my brother. I should have trusted him with this hurt that’s taken up residence in my heart. He has always been my rock, until Alex anyway.
Aiden kisses me on the cheek before leaving me to visit with his friend. For the first time since everything happened, I unload what I’ve been feeling. She seems to know exactly what to say, so I tell her more than I even told Alex. She explains to me that what I’ve been experiencing is not me going crazy, but rather my mind’s reaction to a traumatic event.
After two hours of tears, we stand to leave the room. She’s set up two more appointments for me this week and gives Aiden a prescription to be filled on the way to his home to help get my mind back in focus.
Walking into Aiden’s house, Felicity, my sister-in-law, pulls me into a hug meant to crush a bear. For once, I don’t try to avoid it, but hold on to her for everything I’m worth. She insists on me taking a long hot bath in their huge tub before she plies me with two bowls of her homemade macaroni and cheese. I think she is trying to mother me like she does her kids when they’re sick. It’s a nice feeling.
The next week with the combination of therapy and antidepressants has me feeling more like myself again.
Toward the end of the week, Aiden takes the day off from his hectic surgery schedule to spend the day with me. After lunch, we decided to drive to the Columbia River Gorge. I love the waterfalls, so we decide to hike some when we arrive.
“How are you really feeling now?” Aiden asks me as we stand watching the water tumble over the rocks.
“Good. More like myself again,” I answer before continuing our hike.
